While you re all busy watching shite karaoke programmes like X Factor where you idolise over someone for a few months before discarding him like last night s takeaway, we literally produce litres of blood, sweat and tears to bring you stuff that will blow your little mind away. Literally.
This week we think we rsquo;ve found the most extreme and out-there sound around. Before we tell you the name of the act for this week s trawl, we have to revisit two previous artists featured so you can begin to imagine what your about to be listening to. In the very beginning, we introduced you to Glasgow two-piece Gay Against You.
They took the style of breakcore, powerpop and stuff that sounded like they belonged on Gameboys. Basically it was crazy and unique. Another act we looked at was the mentalist sound of Cutting Pink With Knives.
This blew open the genre doors for most of you as we entered the world of grindcore. Fast furious guitars with equally fast vocals. This week rsquo;s band combines both features of the two bands we just mentioned.
Say hello to Drumcorps.
Posted in , on November 30th, 2006 |
Andrew Jackson led people by sending the army to march them barefoot and tattered to the barren American mid-west, minutes before said people were intending to start dinner. What we re getting at here is leaders throughout history have demonstrated unique and distinctive boss-people-around type styles.
Jesse Jackson is no different. His current method of choice is to wreak havoc on Seinfeld season 7 s holiday DVD sales.
Welcome to hell, Jerry, welcome to hell.
And now for the bad news.
Instead of spending all her new free doing something useful, like arm-wrestling bears for control of the woods or burning all of her weirdly tidy boyfriend s hairbands, Charlotte Church is doing the one thing we didn t want her to do. That s right - Charlotte Church has quit music to pursue her dreadful television presenting career. But the bad news isn t as bad as you think, because if Charlotte Church really has quit music then hopefully she won t be doing those scalp-tearingly harrowing opera duets with Nelly Furtado at the end of her show any more.
Posted in , , on November 30th, 2006 |
On Saturday s Strictly Come Dancing Claire King somehow managed to perform her worst dance yet; she spent the entirety of her routine jerking around like a crash test dummy in a baby seat, and the judges scolded it for her. But now, free of having to dance every single weekend, Claire King can go ahead and return to being the slutty-looking woman who used to be on Emmerdale, while her Strictly Come Dancing partner Brendan Cole can go around being irritatingly sleazy to everyone he meets at times other than when we re trying to eat our tea.
But who s going to win Strictly Come Dancing? Here are the Strictly Come Dancing betting odds for Carol Smillie, Matt Dawson and Emma Bunton
Posted in on November 30th, 2006 |
One of the perks of being famous is that you can dress however the hell you want, and within weeks you ll see a fleet of kids copying your look from head to toe - and this is something that upsets animal rights group PETA greatly.
PETA is worried that youngsters of today will see Nicole Richie on TV and - instead of the immediate Holy Jesus, she s so thin!
Surely that s not normal! response that Nicole Richie tends to get when people see her - become so awe-struck about what she s wearing that they ll rush out and copy her. Since Nicole Richie tends to wear a lot of fur these days, PETA has become so riled that it has named Nicole Richie the Worst-Dressed Celebrity In The World.
All this despite the fact that only one poorly squirrel was skinned to create all 25 pieces of outerwear in Nicole Richie s freakishly tiny wardrobe.
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