sexually explicit American movie outside of the porn industry. It mainstream movie, yet the scenes tend to show sex as it really is - as a flawed, funny and slightly absurd event.
Hollywood movies where everyone is beautiful, every coupling is magic, everyone climaxes together and post-coital bliss is compulsory.
Which raises the question: what other myths about sex does Hollywood perpetrate? Here are 10 of the great sex myths in movies.
Parked cars, outdoor spas, space shuttles .
. . no location is taboo for Hollywood sex.
A couple join the mile-high club and are then bitten to death in Snakes on a Plane. Tom Cruise gawking wino out in Risky Business. Olivier Martinez and Unfaithful.
If you're not in danger of being arrested every time you have sex, you're not adventurous enough.
Did you bring a condom? The answer in Hollywood is invariably, umm, no.
They also never stop to ask about anyone's sexual history i.e. "Ever had the clap?
" Pretty Woman is the exception, one shining example of safe condom in a variety of colours.
What, no foreplay? foreplay.
To quote John Cleese's petulant schoolteacher in The Meaning Of Life: "What's wrong with a kiss, boy? Hmm? Why not start her off with a nice kiss?
You don't have to go leaping straight for the clitoris like a bull at a gate." Leading men often leap for the love button without any attempt at foreplay. Not that need any.
All Penthouse letters end in synchronised orgasms. So, usually, do Tinseltown sex scenes. Michael Douglas and Sharon Stone Instinct.
Stone must have been happy with his performance, and murder him.
Unfortunately, they never return the favour. Perhaps they were turned off by the example of Jennifer Lopez in Gigli, who lies down and says "it's turkey time - gobble, gobble".
Nice.
In Hollywood, good sex is loud sex. When Meg Ryan loudly faked an orgasm in When Harry Met Sally, she set the volume level for all other actors.
Jennifer Aniston was a regular bedroom Pavarotti with Jim Carrey in Bruce Almighty. But to be fair, he did have the power of God at the time. Madeline Kahn went Frankenstein.
So there's the lesson for you - unless you have changes colour after sex, you're not doing it right.
Spectacular vanilla sex is never enough, either. Hollywood must ratchet up the kinkiness level.
James Spader is the king of kink: sex in Sex, Lies, and Videotape. Mickey Rourke turns a Weeks. Tom Long is tied down and molested by three masked women in The Book of Revelation.
Dennis Hopper inhales gas Blue Velvet. Madonna pours hot wax on Willem Dafoe's groin in Body of Evidence. Bet he found that erotic on his way to the emergency ward.
And if there is, no one refers to it. Nor shall we.
Elmo's Fire.
William Hurt wants Kathleen Turner so badly he hurls a Heat. Patrick Swayze and Demi Moore grope over a pottery wheel in Ghost. But who really is willing to have their quick shag.
Sorry, married folks: it's the singles who get to swing from Campbell.
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