Well here was my friday and saturday for you
Got up friday with a day off and spent it mostly just watching the rest of my movies. Then went to the strip bar with this somewhat tehnical date would be not my choice mind you. Ended up meeting this girl, she is a cool person, someone I can be attracted to, at least she likes AC/DC, not on the level as me but she enjoys it.
It looks like i might have a chance with her but knowing me and the fact that all women are out of hurt me because they hate/fear/pity my ugly ass I wont have a chance even though I really need someone in my lonely life. She was an hour late though for the time she set out for. I hate being early because I always end up be the only one on time and I wait for an hour two for whom else or they dont even sho up (as you will see).
Anyways who knows about that venture.
Yesterday however was a waste of a day I spent my day dreading what would happen but by the time it all came to be nothing happened.
I went downtown and wen to the first bar looked for the big group of yuppie hippies.
Instead I sat for an hour watching my favorite hockey team get their ass kicked. How ironic, last year I sai dmy chances of getting with Kat were the same as Edmonton winning the Stanely Cup and 2 days after the loss I get my heart shot with an revolver. Here I am nearly over the slutty stupid coke whore waiting to try and extend and olive branch and she doesn't so up, and the oilers are losing, of course its obvious why they cut themselves of all the stars that made the team good in the first plac,e leave it to the owners of the Oliers to strip themselves of goodness all o fthe time but then they ar elike me, I reject whatever good qualities because i am a disgusting person no ones wants anyway.
So I leave the bar and head for th eother that she said she might have it in. Wasted 8 bucks on a cover charge to find a near enpty room that resembles an old church or the church in Batman. I wait anoter hour now pretty drunk.
Then I walk back up to the other bar again, no one. So then I call her no answer. I talk to other friends and Tyler of course says I am sucker for this I should have known she would never have it her abilities to schedual things and keeping tabs with everyone is as deplorable as her morals.
I then get a call from her. She says that she got sick and she didn't even say sorry instead she made jokes about how old she feels these days like the ditzy bitch she was. I should have been drunk enought ot ell her off there but instead I still have no fucking spine I went along and said ok and whatever (still sounding like I was mad and didn't give a shit).
I doubt she even cares inf act she probably was sleeping with her british emo bastard boyfriend.
But alas that is what I get, its bad enough anytime I invited her to do anything and never got an answer or got a maybe I would wait hours at the place all of the time and she would never come. its bad when she invites me to go to her BD party and and the only one shows up because I am the only one who didn't know it was canceled so I was going to make a blog on my myspace directed at her, should I post it.
"Yeah I am pretty steamed, why is it when I come down to bring an olive branch nothing more, I try to be friendly and not the antisocial self I get kicked in balls by some oblivous stupid/ditzy person. It was bad enough when I liked the person I would wait hours on end for nothing but being invited to wait is another thing and have to waste probably 8 bucks and be at one place wait an hour not there go to another place have another beer and another hour not there call to find out it wont happen. Its pretty stupid to be invited to a BD part you are the only one that shows up to because you were the only one who wasn't told chances are she just wanted me to look like a fool.
That is pretty fucking lame just goes to show how much of a fucking lame and a sorry ass friend one person was or i should say lack there of was from the get go (never was a good fucking friend to begin with) so from one loser to another who thinks they are but is just a ditzy hypocrite go fuck yourself you god damn coke whore. When you wake up and still "find yourself" to be a nice person all I got to say is climb a higher mountain because you are not!"
I used that find yourself because she once said she found herself after climbing a mountain in Alberta and had a new lease on life.
She isn't a good person. But one good thung about this is that now I have no interest in her anymore.
I think I willw ait for her next blog if she will even mount a decent applogy which I doubt chances are she would forget all about it.
I went home and stuffed my face with bits Bites with M Ms for the first time a long time (first time for junk food in a long time). Watched Spider it was ok but nothing to brag about I also got to watch American Splendor, god that was a movie I needed right then and there, the funnies thing was I didn't really change at the end of th emovie the character in it was too much like me it was cary but then the guy is a real person. In the end its similar both of us angry lonely at dead end jobs, both of us the female race hates because we are poster childs for the so unsexy Hugh Jackman types, both angry at the human race and ever really happy.
So how is my week going to be
Today
Watch Vannilla Sky and Exetence maybe
Then go to work at OSF
then sleep
MOnday
Work in the morning at Petcetera
Finish my movies
go to sleep early or stay up late eniough to talk to comic girl even though I feel like I dont want to talk to her anymore she doesn't treat me much like a friend anymore just some aquaintance while she hangs with everyone else. But then that is how all women are, I fucking hate all you women I mean they are all out ot hur tme anyways. And yet it doesn't matter I will never bite them dog wise I was always heel and yearn for their effection like a dog, and I fucking hate myself for that.
fuck all of you!
Tuesday to Thursday
14 hour work day or so
8am to 3pm pet store
5:30pm to 12:30 pm at the spagetti place
Friday
Day off again, it seems to be my official day of of sorts, nice I should ask that girl out again (irony after the last few remakrs but then its not I am a dog,.too bad I always find bitches - my attempt at a joke)
So far this one isn't a bitch but i know everyone calls her oen and I can guess why because she is upfrotn and honest but that is to me one of my biggest turn ons to her is the honestly I like being around people, more so women who dont bullshit around, dont sugar coat, they will say shit straight up.
I liek to think I am that way most of th etime but the thing is I dont say nothing at all because no one can take it but I say my peace when I will talk and only to the people I know can handle it these days. I just hope this works out I am probably one step away these days before going for #10.
Sautrday
Off at th epet store, working at OSF
Which means watch movies int he day, work at night
That i smy schedual for this week, no real goals i accomplished them all now is just the waiting and working game.
I like ot think that sex doesn't mean shit to me or at least not as much compared to other guys and I always like to hold true to that subject. However I feel like i am in heat these days I guess its the season that for some reason why my testosterone has been going off the scale, it happens everyonce in awhile I mean it happens to everyone in one way or the other wher eyou get extremely horny for no reason. Me I am annoyed about it why because I have no girlfriend to eliviate the problem, two the fact that these are the days where I should be sleeping at least 8 to 10 hours a day to save up for the days when I know I will only get 4 hours of sleep.
Instead Iw ake up with the bare minimum 8 hours and instead of going back to sleep I feel like I have to do something else, to tell you the truth its annoying to me, guys know what I am talking about but then I ams ure some women do as well. I wish there was an answer for it but it just happens.
After watching American Splendor I was thinking about movies that meant something to me, they usually have a connection with me at one point or another and I figured it would be a nice thing to talk about.
Maybe at one point I can watch them all back to back and hopefully get the inspiration to write again I just cant do anything creative these days I see it in my head but I just can't put it down on paper. It slike I wish I had printer paper in my brain that would come out when I thought of the story I know I got to have at least something to work with so I have beent rying to do that. Maybe watching all of the movies that meant something to me could help me make the movie I want to make, a movie about me I suppose is what i am guessing still very much the loner script somedays I want it to just be a 10 page short somtimes a full length.
I think i need to make a playlist of all the songs I conenct with good and badand then write but the thing tha tpisses me off is that there arte so many other songs that fit better that i odnt have and dont know the names of. For example one thing I want to show in my movie is the music that is playing at th eintercom stereo at work always reflects what he is feeling despite how hokey and cheesey the 90s greatest hits cd they hav eon there.
Who knows I already have one version of the Loner which is a short which I am proud of.
Anyways the movies.
I already talked about American Splendor.
Mask - I am watching it right now and I am not talking about the jim Carrey movie I talking about the one with Cher in the 80s.
Anyone who has seen that movie can guess at why that movies means something to me, I like the movie for its honesty but it is still very cinematic or hollywoodish. Also it has Sam Elliot I dont know why but for some reason anytime i see Sam Elliot in something its interesting. That is one of my goals is that if I ever make a full length movie I have to have Sam Elliot in that movie just something about him I dont know.
If i was to ever make a movie about my life chances are he would be my dad.
Sabrina - the original one, because it reminded me of film school or like any other time, but the funny thing is people like me better when I am not myself.
Spiderman 1 2 - when you have something that is curse and I guess sort of wishing you can use that curse for something better and always going after the girl I am pretty sure someone gets it but i imagine the ending of spiderman 2 alot "isn't it about time someone saved you peter"
Batman begins - being willed into things
Batman Returns - split personalities
Hellboy - roughly Mask meets Spiderman
Mary Reilly - have a dark side
One Hour Photo - being lonel to the point of insanity regardless if the action is justifyable
Bringing Out The Dead - Rj used ot say the main character fit him more than me, nowadays I disagree.
Deconstructing Harry - how I cant keep my mouth shut and the truth I spew or whatever tends to piss everyon off, usuallycoming from this blog or something else
Deer Hunter - Going from a proud loner to a person who doesn't care anymore. In the beginning I was connected with De Nrio's character quiet head strong an ddetermined like i was before film school, by the end of the movie I was on the side of christopher walken because I was and still is like him at the end of film school.
Amelie - I am always found helping other people with their problems and cheering them up but I can never save myself and no one else is willing to, well until the end of this movie but that is the cinematic world
Taxi Driver - VERy self explanitory
Annie Hall - my bad luck with women
High Fidelity - same
Anything ELse - same
The Apartment - Never having a spine, letting people walk over me
Schindler's List - Not really a connection with me but a movie that embraces change
Punch Drunk Love - the first movie before I seen a good amount of these where I felt a strong connection
Heaven Earth - witht ommy lee Jones character fighting demons
Sideways - reminds me of my friendship with Tyler and mostly how I feel I will grow up acting like
My Life - Not being able to put away negative energy
Shopgirl - dealing with other people's lies
All That Jazz/Permanent midnight - personal self destruction
Life Death of Peter Sellers - being obsessive and ignorant, putting mysel fover others at times
Art School Confidential - perfectly explains my time at film school to a T, except the ending
Ghost World - having a personality disorder, connecting with the black haired girl and Steve Buscemi
The Lady Eve - another movie about lies
Game 6 - never trusting people and always believing the worst will always happen
Bronco Billy - society of losers who band up to be what they want to be in a circus
Little Miss Sunshine - reminds me of my time with Jeff and probably the open part of the movie with Steve Carrell perfect describes me most of th etime.
LA Confidential - being fucked over by women and their cruelty, yes connected with Russell Crow's character.
Play It Again Sam - trying to be like Humphrey Bogart
Eternal Sunshine of the spotless mind - self explanitory and sort of kat as well sadly
So far in 2007
Have you had a gf/bf? No, never will have one
Have you had your birthday?
No, thatg doesn't come till november, if I last that long which I honestly dont want to tot tell you the truth
Been to church? No, religion is comparable to me as star trek, lor dof th erings, star wars, etc etc. Its a story with characters adn amnifest a certainw ay of living that people choose to follow
Cried yet?
2 weeks ago
Had someone close to you pass away? No.
Pulled an all nighter?
No dont want to
Drank starbucks? No. I can't stand coffee and stuff.
Gone shopping? Sure.
Gone to the movies?
no, the living room is my theater
Been to the beach? Nope.
Bought something over £200?
No
Met someone new? yes
Been out of your home town? Yes I am not in it as we speak
Gone snowboarding?
Nope.
In the past month, have you
Kissed someone? No not in 22 years
Slept in a friends bed?
Slept on a friend's couch
Snuck someone over? No need. I pay my rent and bills, so I can have anyone I want over my place.
Snuck out of your own house? No reason to.
Been in a bar?
Sure.
Lied? Not really.
I'm quite honest about most things.
Gotten a car? Nope.
Gone over your cell phone bill? Nope.
Been called a whore?
I would laugh at them
Drove somewhere? I dont have a car
Done something you regret? still living is my only regret these days
Lasts
Thing you bought?
beer
Person you hugged? the girl I sort of went out wit
Person to call you? my parents or Kat
Last time you took a bubble bath?
years ago
When was the last time you walked/ran over a mile? yesterday
Who was the last person who saw you cry? Yash
Who was the last person who made you cry?
Kat
Who was the last person you watched a movie with? my room mate
Who was the last person you danced with? I don't dance
Who did you last yell at?
my parents
Who last told you they loved you? My mother and I said, yeah well you are the only one
Time started: 2:46 PM
1] Is there someone who you like at the moment?
yes
2] Does that someone know that you like them?
One does I am sur,e the other maybe, the other whom I hate now knows but not that that really means shit
3] What is your all-time favorite romance movie?
Sabrina
4] How many times can you honestly say you've been in love..
.?
Neve rmutual, never will be
5] Do you believe that everyone has a soul-mate?
No, because they never met me
6] Do you think that you should put your friends first or your bf/gf?
its a balance but i mean my friend puts his gf over me so I would put my gf if i ever had one over him
7] Have you ever had your heart broken?
only thing i ever felt
8] What do you think about long-distance relationships?
I should be the last guy to ask these questions
9] Your thoughts on online relationships?
its useless
1O] Would you rather date someone five years older or five years younger?
Younger girls tend to like me more than older girls, but what is the difference I dont care
12] Do you believe the statement, "Once a cheater always a cheater.
"?
yes
13] How many kids do you want to have?
None I dont want to be resonsible for another one of me around I curse my blood parents for not doing an abortion on me chances are one of my real parents was like me
14] Do you usually fall for the right boy/girl?
No I fall for women who act smart but as soon as you get to know them they are not very smart
15] What is your favorite color(s)?
Blue, black, red
16] What are your views on gay marriage?
I dont see why everyone makes a fuss over t
17] Do you believe you truly only love once?
No
18] Imagine you're 79 your spouse just died. would you remarry?
No, I wont live to be 79 plus I wont get marries
19] At what age did you start noticing the opposite sex?
I was before everyone else, like around 5
20] Do you think that someone likes you?
No, I thought someone did but I am sure that person only did it to cheer me up
1. Name -- Corey
2.
Ethnicity -- Caucasian.
3. Zodiac sign -- Scorpio
5.
Eye color -- Blue
6. Favorite color -- Blue
7. Glasses –- yes
8.
Tattoos -- None
*HAVE YOU EVER*
13. Cut your own hair? Yes
14.
Done something you regret? - living
15. Bungee-jumped?
- No
16. Punched someone? - Yes.
17. Cheated on a test? - no
18.
Been arrested? - No
19. Broken in someone's house?
- No.
20. Been Rejected?
- Yes
21. Been to a funeral? - no
22.
Used a lighter? - Yes
23. Been on stage?
- Yes
*FAVORITE*
24. Season - Winter
25. Food - Italian
28.
Breakfast - Anything but cereal.
29. Person(s) - I hate everyone
37.
Name for a son - Christopher or Alexander, Dustin maybe
38. Name for a daughter- Caroline
*DO YOU PREFER*
40. Coffee or Cappuccino?
- neither
41. Long or short relationships? - Long
43.
Scary movies or comedies? - both
44. Short or long hair on the opposite sex?
- depends.
45. Fruits or vegetables?
- Both
*FIRST THINGS THAT COME TO MIND*
46. Chainsaw - horror
47. School - rejection
48.
Cows - moo
49. Canada - cold
50. Mouse - tom
*IN THE PAST 3 DAYS, HAVE YOU*
52.
Talked on the phone? - yes
53. Watched a movie?
Yes.
54. Cried?
- no
55. Smoked? - No.
56. Drank a glass of water? - yes
57.
Done drugs? - No.
58.
Read a book or magazine? - yes
59. Watched TV?
- yes
61. Taken a shower? - Yes.
62. Taken a picture? - no
63.
Listened to music? - Yes.
64.
Told someone you loved them? - no
65. Watched a football game on tv?
No.
66. Stolen anything?
No.
TIME FINISHED: 2:53 PM
Put how long it took you to take this in the survey in the subject
"The __ Minute Survey
7 minutes
Crayon box survey
RED = ANGER
1. Are you currently mad at someone?
: Yes
2. Which of your family members has the worst temper?: Me
3.
Have you ever thrown something at anyone?: no
4. Does your face turn red when you're angry?
: no I get darker
5. When you're mad do you prefer to stare angrily or yell?: stare angrily
ORANGE = EXCITEMENT
1.
Has anyone ever thrown a surprise party for you?: No I dont have any friends who would od that for me I usually invite alot of people and only a few come
2. Are you easily excited?
: No
3. What event is coming up that you're most excited about?: Nothing
4.
If you won a million dollars, what would be your first thought?: an enlargement, and I will make my movie
5. If you could have anything right now what would it be?
: a love bu that wont happen so nevermind
YELLOW = SELF DISCOVERY
1. Name?: corey
2.
Birthday?: 11/12/84
3. Do you want to have children?
: no
4. How do you want to die?: I dont really care at this moment
GREEN = OPINIONS
1.
Are you against gay marriage?: No
2. Lower the drinking age?
: No
3. Capital Punishment?: I think it should be an option but the very VERY option
4.
Abortion?: choice of oth in involved
BLUE = LOVE
1. Do you love someone?
: love, hate both the same
2. Do you have a bf/gf?: No
3.
Do you believe in love at first sight?: tat is what is called lust
PURPLE = Q A
Q: How many beds did you lay in today?: One
Q: What color shirt are you wearing?
: black
Q: Name one thing that you do everyday?: wake up
Q: How much cash do you have on you right now?: 30 bucks
Q: Is Tom on your Top friends list?
: no
Q: Look to your left. What's there?: the fan
Q: What's the last piece of clothing you borrowed from someone?
: I don't borrow clothes
Q: What website(s) do you visit the most during the day?: yahoo mail
Q: Do you have plants in your room?: No
Q: what city was you last taxi ride in?
: almost a year
Q: Do you own a picture phone?: no
Q: When's the last time you were really upset?: Today, yesterday tomorrow
PINK = LAST
1.
Person you saw: a room mate
2. Last food you ate?:m Ms
3.
Movie watched in the theatres?: Casino Royale
4. Song you listened to: Hunry Heart by Bruce Springsteen
5.
Person you talked on the phone with: Tyler
GREY = TODAY
1. What are you doing right now?: go to work
2.
What are you doing tonight: talk to RJ and go home and to bed
BROWN = TOMORROW
1. Is: monday
2. Goal: to work and then go home and sleep
3.
Are you going to laugh: no, nor smile i never smile truly people say I do but that is only cause they want me to, i haven't truly smiles in a long time and I feel I wont for a long time
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