1. Attended the Michael Pollan v John..
.
michaelpollan.com/" Michael Pollan /a span style="font-weight: bold;" v /span a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://www.wholefoodsmarket.
com/blogs/jm/" John Mackey /a span style="font-weight: bold;" /span a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://journalism.berkeley.edu/events/details.
php?ID=371" smackdown /a last night. It was very cool I must say.
If you want to learn some stuff about it, go over a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?
v=Guh4Sro2_RM" here /a or a href="http://www.urlfan.com/local/tracking_the_whole_foods_pollan_debate/14083539.
html" here /a . Mackey, CEO of Whole Foods felt compelled, after reading span style="font-style: italic;" The Omnivore's Dilemma /span by Michael Pollan, to begin a dialogue with Pollan about the good stuff Whole Foods is doing to push toward support of, and better consumer access to, real and whole foods. As a note: Whole Foods took a bit of a beating in Pollan's book, who condemned Whole Foods for its "supermarket pastoral" (how when you walk in you feel the words and pictures stimulate you into thinking just being in the store is somehow heathier) and its support of Big Organic, which to Pollan, isn't that much better than regular old industrialized agriculture.
br / br / Everyone knows Whole Foods' most famous nickname: Whole Paycheck. And it came up in the talk too. Everyone also knows when you buy $14 Chilean asparagus in the middle of a California winter it's going to be gross.
Also came up during the talk. But formulating your entire opinion about Whole Foods Markets based on these two word-of-mouth and perhaps personally experienced things is unfair. I am guilty of this myself, for sure - with the added benefit of peer pressure from hard core local/sustainable/community farming a href="http://poetwithadayjob.
blogspot.com/2007/02/from-olivia-to-oscar-true-life-story-of.html#links" angry lesbian /a foodies.
br / br / But sometimes I think we jump to condemn things that are trying to be better because they are imperfect: Whole Foods is, after all, a capitalist venture and everyone knows you simply cannot dismantle the master's house using the master's tools (change from an industrialized, corn-producing mass meat eating nation - most of what we grow (upwards of 70%) in the US goes to feed animals we eat from feedlots in our mcfood - to a sustainable agricultural nation). Or we condemn it because when external forces like a market ups the ante of what's considered quality and healthy, it forces us to look at ourselves, and up our own ante for what we are putting into our bodies. Sometimes, it's simply too hard to change.
We're addicted to cookies, really cheap cookies, and the organic version is like, a lot more costly than Oreos. So we criticize the attempt, that way, we can still have our cheap 7-11 cookies in the middle of the night. br / br / The point is prices in the Unites States in stores everywhere have been set my Wal-Mart.
What does that have to do with eating organic and shopping at Whole Foods? In a nutshell: when Wal-Mart makes something $.05 a pound and you buy it there, you think it is feasible that you've been swindled everywhere else things are not $.
05 a pound. The phrase I span style="font-style: italic;" can get it cheaper somewhere else /span and grabbing a store by the balls is the friggen American Way. It's capitalism, competition, and we pride ourselves on that crap.
The truth is, Wal-Mart, by creating that price point, places the producers into a kind of serfdom (and us, too, by altering our belief that we spend too much money on food as it is and forcing our choice from us by creating a sense of cheaper is better. It's not. Cheaper is never tastier, fresher or better.
It's just doable. The truth? Peeps in the US spend only 8% of our disposable income on food.
Other nations spend 10 and 15% percent). br / br / But back to our poor producer in serfdom to Wal-Mart: if the producer can no longer sustain his business on the Wal-Mart price, or even go lower as, over time, seemingly smacking inflation in the face Wal-Mart will say I need a "better" price on this - Wal-Mart will simply take its business elsewhere. The problem is, Wal-Mart demands and moves so much product, the producers of said product can only handle the one account - Wal-Mart.
If Wal-Mart were to leave them...
therein lies the rub. br / br / What that does to a human being, a consumer, like, my brother for example: not a lot of money so he shops at Wal-Mart for his family. They have so much product, he thinks the norm is that everything is always available to everyone all the time at little or no cost.
He buys salmon for three cents a pound. He hears on the news that Wal-Mart has a bad rap (for whatever reason, sound bytes and word-of-mouth carry little fact but, like economics, have long-lasting effects on the market because they carry a lot of emotion), maybe he should try to shop at Whole Foods. He goes in looking for his two-cent salmon and what he finds is, sometimes, there is no salmon at all and when it is there, it's many dollars a pound.
Well, he's heard it's better to eat salmon than red meat. So he should go back to Wal-Mart for that salmon, it's cheap, and they have it. br / br / No one thinks about where the salmon comes from and why it is so cheap.
We just credit Wal-Mart with being a savvy capitalist who must really not be making much money off consumers by finding our food for us and offering us such low prices. Whole Foods, on the other hand, is clearly robbing you blind. But actually, Wal-Mart makes a crap load MORE money than Whole Foods, and does a lot less in the community with it.
How do they make more money? They sell more product. Their philosophy is quantity not quality.
This is the reverse philosophy of Whole Foods, who is trying to create a sustainble food environment so that, my god, it doesn't run out. Because at the Wal-Mart price point and consumption pace, it will. I would go so far as to say Wal-Mart is single handedly to blame for the near-extinct state of our ocean fish.
(For more reading on Wal-Mart buy a href="http://www.amazon.com/Wal-Mart-Effect-Powerful-Works-Transforming/dp/1594200769/sr=8-1/qid=1172683134/ref=sr_1_1/104-9707410-0030310?
ie=UTF8 s=books" span style="font-style: italic;" The Wal-Mart Effect /span /a by Charles Fishman. It is totally awesome and Fishman is a great writer, like Pollan. In fact, it is a nice companion piece.
) br / br / So, I really enjoyed the talk. Of course I despise Bay Area audiences and their damn hissing when they don't like something. So childish.
Basically, any CEO who knows he is not as intelligent and articulate as a journalist/professor trying to rip him a new one but risks everything to go on stage and defend his passions and goals in a face-to-face in front of 2,000 people and even more on the webcast is pretty okay in my book. You would never see G-dub or Enron never mind that filthy rich Walton family in a smackdown. Never.
Unless of course Ali-G somehow convinced them to come on his show. How does he manage to do it? span style="font-weight: bold;" br / br / 2.
Ms. Indecisive. /span span This should be my nickname nowadays.
Thank you to everyone who read and responded to my personal problems. That's true dedication to PWADJ, and I appreciate it. I am working on a T-shirt right now, so hopefully, you can buy one and advertise me on your body too!
THAT would be dedication! But seriously, thanks. br / br / I can't seem to figure anything out right now, and as I get older, I seem to be approaching an endless black hole of indecision about everything.
I never used to have trouble picking a flavor of something, or knowing what I wanted for dinner, or figuring out what to do on a Saturday night. But now, everything seems like a major production. Which riding lesson should I take: Saturday at 9 am or Sunday at 1 pm?
Which job should I take: the one with lots of duties and low pay, or the one with lots of duties and high pay? Which wordpress template should I pick? Where should I host my blog?
What do I read next? Do I really like Cool Ranch Doritos? Shower or bath?
I've even been wearing mostly the same clothes all the time because I just don't know what to wear anymore. Is this an age thing? Or is it.
.. br / br / /span span style="font-weight: bold;" 3.
Menstruation. /span Do we really need another blog entry on it? Probably not, but I suppose you could stand to hear how PWADJ deals at least once monthly.
Or doesn't deal. First off, I take five walprofen to curb my first day cramps. FIVE!
My doctor is equally as stunned as you. However, her solution is for me to take two a day every day, regardless of cramps, that way the ibu will be span style="font-style: italic;" in my system /span so the cramps will never have the chance to get bad enough that I'll feel the need to take five at once. br / br / Ostensibly, this is to protect the coating of my stomach and help me not get addicted or poisoned.
Okay. Let's do a little math on that then shall we? br / br / span style="font-weight: bold;" One bad cramp day monthly = 3 doses of 5 pills = 15 ibuprofen ingested monthly.
/span br / br / span style="font-style: italic;" vs. /span br / br / span style="font-weight: bold;" 2 pills every day for 31 days = 62 ibuprofen ingested monthly. /span br / br / Now, which one is gonna rip a hole in my stomach and get me addicted?
PS: if she just gave me the damned prescription motrin I asked for, then we wouldn't be having this blog entry because that shit removes every semblance of cramps from my person. But no, she wants to give me anaprox. WTF?
That's about as useful to me as eating salt. No, not even that useful cause the salt's tasty. span style="font-weight: bold;" br / br / 4.
What up with the blogger comment word verification lately? /span I've been getting a string of like forty thousand letters to enter, which of course, increases my rate of error when trying to enter them and now blogger thinks I am some kind of criminal. Dude, but for reals.
I recently had this: span style="font-style: italic;" sovdznmlmbqgg /span . WTF? br / br / span style="font-weight: bold;" 5.
It's not normal /span to bring the alarm under the covers with you so that when it goes off again you can snooze it without getting cold. Is it?
..
/span br / br / It's a mess and I don't even feel safe to talk about it on my own damn blog, because I can be found! I hate being able to be found (except for when I want to be found). br / br / But I don't hate it more than I hate being co-dependent.
For, if I weren't co dependent I wouldn't give a crap who found me. Because essentially, the problem with being found bitching on your blog is: you could hurt span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" someone's /span feelings. And I am so not about that.
At the same time, I tend to err on the side of hurting myself to spare someone span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" else's /span feelings. And today, I think I realized I must stop it. Now.
br / br / I came to this job because a friend of mine - an old boss worked here and wanted me to come and work along side her as we rode the high wave of capital campaign fundraising. I am reminded of the conversation between Harry and Sally in span style="font-style: italic;" When Harry Met Sally /span where Harry talks about how women and men can't be friends. Can bosses and workers really be friends?
I digress...
br / br / Campaigns are fun, because they are fresh, and exciting, and challenging and different - not your usual run-of-the-mill direct mail and membership driving. A Capital Campaign is the fundraising equivalent of, say, I don't even know because I've only ever worked in non profits and fundraising. Maybe it is the equivalent of getting a brand new pair of shoes or a big fat bag of groceries from whole foods, that span style="font-style: italic;" didn't /span cost $4,567.
890. I don't fucking know, actually. br / br / Anyway, I left my last job, ostensibly, to take some time off to write my novel.
It ended up being way too little time, that, as soon as I finally caught the grove of not working and relaxing and being okay with that, it was time to get back to work at this new job. I am reminded here of Claudia Rankine talking once about her residency at span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" Yaddo /span . She went there directly at semester's end, after teaching a full load and said she simply slept the entire three months and didn't write a thing.
Point: rest and relaxation are equal parts with stimulation and inspiration of the recipe for good writing. Off track again..
. br / br / So, still singed from the last job I had in which the newly appointed Executive Director span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" single handedly /span managed 60% turnover of the 15 full time staff (is that a span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" new /span record?), I started at this job, and I started this blog.
And if you've been following, you know that this place is dysfunction junction. And if you are one of the many span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" officlandians /span like me out there, then you know most offices are. But I can't help keep thinking there's got to be a better fit out there for me.
br / br / I feel tortured at an office job, it's true. But I don't know what the hell else I am equipped to do. And worse yet, what I span style="font-style: italic;" want /span to do.
I've kept mid and lower-level development TITLES (I say titles, because I've done span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" friggen /span director level work but never had the title nor pay) thinking if I did that, it would be sure to keep my free time free and my energy level high for poetry (and other kinds) of writing. br / br / Well, we all know, before I even write the next sentence, how much hardcore CRAP that theory's shoveling. And so, here's the thing: why don't I just do the high paying job for a while, get rid of my debt (which is span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8" why I /span do it at all in the first place, these span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9" officelandias /span ) and then, move on with my life?
What is the harm? br / br / L will be going to grad school in the fall. There's no ceremony nor house purchasing until after that - why not take that time she's in school to be a high paying something somewhere?
I can do it. And that I have blogs and do PT and about a million other things shows me if I really, really want to, I will continue writing. Besides, me and L will be long distance for a bunch of months a year, so it's not like I've got anything else to do but watch my span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10" Netflix /span span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_11" and /span write poems.
So why not? br / br / Here's a pro/con type of list to help me decide what to do. br / br / span style="font-weight: bold;" Things I worried about which kept me from taking high paying and high level director jobs: /span br / br / 1.
Little free time, as in, working more than 40 hours a week br / 2. Not having energy to write after work because the job's hard br / 3. Not very much vacation or flexibility in hours br / 4.
Job stress br / 5. Carpal tunnel br / 6. Weight gain (from depression driven by aforementioned items in list) br / 7.
Being sucked into a career that is not of my choosing, but one that I just happen to be good at br / 8. Will never get a job in writing, or helping others improve their writing br / br / span style="font-weight: bold;" Things I have today, not having taken any high-level nor high-paying Director jobs: /span br / br / 1. Little free time, as in, I work upwards of 45 hours a week plus events br / 2.
I go home and turn on the TV. br / 3. Not very much vacation or flexibility in hours (10 business days of vacation ONLY - no personal time.
Nice.) br / 4. Job stress.
Stayed up all night last night. br / 5. Carpal tunnel.
It's hurting right now as a matter of fact. br / 6. Weight gain (from depression driven by aforementioned items in list).
About one whole size in five months. Coincidence? br / 7.
Being sucked into a career that is not of my choosing, but one that I just happen to be good at. Hello (hello hello hello..
..) I'm still here (still here still here still here.
...
) Echo (echo echo echo...
) br / 8. Do not have a job in writing, or helping others improve their writing br / br / span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_12" Hmmm /span ..
.what should I do?
000-08:00
kd responded by telling the interviewer that sometimes, she felt her ego would overtake her, and the only way she could manage to feel humbled, and remind herself that her voice was a gift, was to shave her head. It made her feel exposed, and that was a good thing. br / br / I do not know Britney's story - none of us do, for that matter - but if she really is trying to admit she has a problem with alcohol, it is possible - span style="font-style:italic;" possible /span - that she shaved her head to find within her some semblance of humility that would allow her to turn it over, and get well.
br / br / I can only imagine how difficult humility must be for someone we place in such a limelight. I mean, hell. It's hard for me to have humility when I am trying to convince my cat to come sit with me on the couch and no one even knows who the hell I am.
Dude, sometimes, she just doesn't want to come!
com,1999:blog-35562327.post-4188776395677114723
.
deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://farm1.static.flickr.
com/161/403764339_2b1967472e.jpg?v=0" img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 104px; height: 148px;" src="http://farm1.
static.flickr.com/161/403764339_2b1967472e.
jpg?v=0" alt="" border="0" / /a This is my ridiculously cute niece I nicknamed The Nugget, and..
. br / br / a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://farm1.
static.flickr.com/176/403670470_7338e0b56e.
jpg?v=0" img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 267px; height: 200px;" src="http://farm1.static.
flickr.com/176/403670470_7338e0b56e.jpg?
v=0" alt="" border="0" / /a ...
this is my ridiculously cute kitten the a href="http://poetwithadayjob.blogspot.com/2007/02/psycho-exes-every-lesbian-i-have-ever.
html#links" psycho ex /a named Kitty. br / br / a href="http://fondakowski.wordpress.
com/2007/02/26/rafael-campo-and-day-of-the-gay/" Over here, /a at my other blog (which isn't a split personality thing; it's more a topical thing) I was kind of feeling sorry for myself. So, if you feel like reading about poetry, loss, Rafael Campo, and whining, then don't wait, span style="font-style: italic;" open link in new tab /span NOW. br / br / Below I'd just like to talk about a couple two tree tings.
br / br / span style="font-weight: bold;" 1. So glad Jennifer Hudson won last night. /span But, what struck me as the most beautiful thing of all was when she was doing the song with Beyonce.
Jennifer began with a solo. Her voice was shaky and cracking. I could feel how nervous she was.
Her boob almost fell out of her dress. I felt like at any second, she might just have a nervous breakdown. For, only a moment earlier, she won an Oscar: essentially catapulted from obscurity into a billion households at once.
Then, the rude pianist too-quickly cued her departure from speechdom and dumb dolt Clooney didn't even escort her - ha was five steps behind. Which, I was pissed at. Stupid horse mouth Julia Roberts got like five hours that year she won (ps: she'll never win again) and Clooney swoons over Her Uselessness.
br / br / Anyway, when Beyonce popped out on stage to join the song Hudson began, I could feel in the way she belted out that first note, the way she walked across that stage arm out to Hudson, the look she shot to Hudson on the other side of the stage that she was coming out there to support Hudson - to bring her back around to the song from her nervousness. It seemed to me the most beautiful, courageous, graceful, gracious thing any person could ever have done. span style="font-style: italic;" I got you /span , Beyonce seemed to say, carrying the song so Hudson could follow her, shake her nervousness away, and find her footing.
Beyonce, in all her stage and live singing experience, in all her performing wisdom just gave up her solo to help Hudson's, which in the end, made Beyonce sound even better - and the two together were one of my favorite parts of the Oscars yesterday. Three cheers for Beyonce. I'm herr new numnber 1 fan.
br / br / span style="font-weight: bold;" 2. I opened an ING savings account. /span I feel like such an adult.
br / br / span style="font-weight: bold;" 3. Had an excellent weekend with /span a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://littlezygote.clubmom.
com/" my pal /a span style="font-weight: bold;" . /span Ate a href="http://en.wikipedia.
org/wiki/Sweetbread" sweetbreads /a accidentally thinking they were sweet breads. Prayed a little when I got back and been sick ever since. I am morally against sweetbreads, and now I am morally against naming something so horrific span style="font-style: italic;" sweet /span and span style="font-style: italic;" bread /span , two of my favorite things.
Talk about euphemisms. That's like naming bloody murder cherry pie. I think the menu should say span style="font-style: italic;" sage encrusted pancreas of a brand new baby lamb /span .
Then I'd know not to order it. br / br / span style="font-weight: bold;" 4. Got a funny note in the mail from my Dad.
/span Every year for my birthday he gets me a number of Massachusetts State Lottery scratch tickets, hoping each year I'll Win Big. I obviously have not had the pleasure of winning big yet. The "fun" of the "game" is that, I always win something - $5 here, $30 there - and my father feels compelled not to give me cash for my winnings, but more tickets.
br / br / Now, the thing you need to know about the Massachusetts State Lottery scratch tickets is that they guarantee at least 1 in 4 tickets wins. Which means, when my Dad sends me like 30 for my birthday, wherein I do not win big, I win annoyingly plentifully. The process then goes: br / br / PWADJ sends Dad back the "winning tickets" (which amounts to, say $80.
) br / br / Stubborn Dad really wants PWADJ to Win Big, so sends $80 worth more tickets back. br / br / PWADJ scratches said next batch of tickets, then PWADJ sends Dad back the "winning tickets" (which amounts to, say $80.) br / br / Stubborn Dad really wants PWADJ to Win Big, so sends $80 worth more tickets back.
br / br / And it goes on and on like this for a million years, like nuclear bomb half lives until the he grows weary of the process, or the winnings simply cease. Well, here it is nearly March, my birthday a href="http://poetwithadayjob.blogspot.
com/2006/12/its-my-35th-birthday-and-with-day-off.html#links" was way back here /a , and he just mailed me another two tickets with a note. I love this note so much, I am going to print it for you here: br / br / a onblur="try {parent.
deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://www.lifeisgood.com/product-details.
aspx?sku=AC%20CDOG%20OL description=Camp%20Dog%20on%20Olive from=/category/hats/caps/" img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 109px; height: 96px;" src="http://www.lifeisgood.
com/images/spring07/skus/general/L/ac_cdog_ol_l.gif" alt="" border="0" / /a span style="font-style: italic;" PWADJ: /span br / br / span style="font-style: italic;" Hope you Win Big. If you win small then buy me a new hat.
Ben [the dog, video below] chewed the visor on the one you got me. /span br / br / span style="font-style: italic;" If you don't win buy me a hat anyway. /span br / br / span style="font-style: italic;" If you Win Big buy me several hats and a plane ticket to come and pick them up.
/span br / br / span style="font-style: italic;" Love Dad. /span br / br / Of course, I won $20 on one of the tickets, and so the game continues..
.In the meantime, I will get him the hat. It's a baby blue span style="font-style: italic;" Life is Good /span hat with the logo I pictured and linked here.
br / br / Ben, the Dog: br / object width="425" height="350" param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Ppu2JE8g2kA" /param param name="wmode" value="transparent" /param embed src="http://www.
youtube.com/v/Ppu2JE8g2kA" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350" /embed /object
com,1999:blog-35562327.post-9019202789884825868
309-08:00
br / br / See, a little known fact about Ellen is that, in the span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" comic's /span early years, she had a sort of span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" mullet /span , and was doing Olivia Cruise ship gigs: the notoriously lesbian cruise line. Yes, everyone: poor Ellen spent weeks out at sea trying to make lesbians laugh. Why "poor?
" Because angry feminist lesbian separatists don't laugh. It takes some kind of joking to really get those bellies jiggling. And if that's not trial by fire, I don't know what is: if you can make an angry lesbian laugh, you can make span style="font-style: italic;" anyone /span laugh.
br / br / Which is good because the next hardest crowd after making lesbians laugh, is making celebrities laugh. Why? Because lesbians and celebrities share a very important thing: taking the self span style="font-style: italic;" way /span too seriously.
But tonight Ellen comes full circle: from the absurdity of comedy for lesbians at sea, to the absurdity of comedy for a bunch of self-important narcissists in extremely uncomfortable clothing at the Oscars. And I cannot wait to watch her fly!
..
deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://www.zimmer.com/web/flashmedia/60_Zimmer_480.
html" img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer;" src="http://bp1.blogger.com/_E4xqe3OTEXY/Rdx3TEuzfrI/AAAAAAAAABw/cZLtMKrsPHs/s320/genderkneespot.
gif" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5034029653064646322" border="0" / /a span style="font-weight: bold;" The Gender Knee. /span br / br / span style="font-style: italic;" No one has to tell you that women and men are different /span begins the ad for a href="http://genderknee.com/micro/z/ctl/op/global/action/8" Gender Knee /a .
Hey, you're not kidding. Women are from Venus, in fact, and men are from Mars. And they grunt and stuff, and women clean, too.
br / br / I was sitting with my friend watching span style="font-style: italic;" Heroes /span on Monday (not too shabby an episode, I have to say. I am span style="font-style: italic;" so /span in love with Peter), when this little ad (click the picture to the left to view the TV spot) comes on and my friend bursts out "Oh this is the gender knee." br / br / I of course looked at her like she was crazy, or making some kind of joke.
For, who would name anything a Gender Knee? What the hell is a span style="font-style: italic;" gender knee /span ? Has it undergone reassignment surgery, or is it thinking about it?
br / br / Well, I soon learned that a Zimmer Gender Solutions Knee (its baptismal name) is a fabricated replacement knee made specifically for a woman's body. No more poor results from regular knee replacements which are constructed to best fit a man's body. Which, you know, if you think about it for no more than a split second, it sounds like a great idea.
But if you think about it for more than a split second, here's what you get: br / br / 1) Wouldn't you want a knee replacement (hip, heart, brain, for that matter) to fit perfectly, period? How many old knee replacements failed because the one-size-fits-all Original Man's Knee method is bad for small men, extra large men, and everyone else who is NOT an average man..
.whatever that is? br / br / 2) If you call the knee for woman a Gender Solutions Knee, are you saying that a man has no gender, since his knee is the non-gender, regular knee, and you are solving the "female problem" with this knee?
br / br / 3) If you call the knee for a woman a Gender Solutions Knee, are you saying that the fabricated knee is self-identifying as a cure-all woman's knee? Don't you really mean it is an assigned sex knee? br / br / 4) If you call the knee for a woman a Gender Solutions Knee, does that mean transgendered people get the Gender Knee too?
And what about gay men whose genders are more identified with woman? Do they get the Gender Knee too? And, if they get the Gender Solutions Knee, does this mean all gender dysphoria will cease?
br / br / 5) A claim of the Zimmer Gender Solutions Knee is that it is far more flexible than a regular man's knee replacement knee. Are you saying that men move less than women, so they only require an inflexible knee replacement? But women, who just never stop moving in very erratic directions, need a hard core flexiknee nad leave the men to walk like robots, like normal?
br / br / 6) Is a woman's knee an extra special knee because it has boobs, and/or a vagina? br / br / 7) Why couldn't you call it femmeknee? Did you think that would be more insulting, or more confusing, than Gender Knee?
It wouldn't. It would fit right in there with other a href="http://www.femhealth.
com/" FemHealth /a products. Better yet, you could just call it the Personally Adaptable Knee, made specifically to custom fit The Human Body. Perhaps that's asking too much.
br / br / 8) If you start calling things for women Gender Solutions things, then you should do that across the board. You should fix us, STAT. Here's an example: Gender Solutions Pads: no more periods, period!
br / br / Okay, okay. I'm done being mad about the ignoramous name of this replacement knee, and the idiocy of our health care system which bases all its procedures and surgeries on span style="font-style: italic;" The Average Man /span . Who the hell is that anyway?
I don't know a single average man. Thank God. br / br / And since we're thanking God for various and sundry things: br / br / a onblur="try {parent.
deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://bp0.blogger.com/_E4xqe3OTEXY/Rdx_Q0uzfsI/AAAAAAAAAB4/vnKRjnTQraA/s1600-h/babscats.
jpg" img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 198px; height: 272px;" src="http://bp0.blogger.com/_E4xqe3OTEXY/Rdx_Q0uzfsI/AAAAAAAAAB4/vnKRjnTQraA/s320/babscats.
jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5034038410502962882" border="0" / /a (Yes, the above cat looks like Babs, how rude, span style="font-style: italic;" and /span ) thank You God that the a href="http://www.snopes.com/photos/arts/paintedcats.
asp" Painted Cats is an Urban Legend. /a Unending gratitude to a href="http://glutenfreebay.blogspot.
com/" Gluten Free /a for saving me from more retching. I was about to call PETA when a href="http://jaschneider.blogspot.
com/" JS /a forwarded the pics to me.
com,1999:blog-35562327.post-2567316162212096390
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newyorker.com/" The New Yorker /a magazine entitled a href="http://www.newyorker.
com/fact/content/articles/070219fa_fact_goodyear" "The Moneyed Muse. /a " br / br / The article was about the state of a href="http://poetrymagazine.org/" The Poetry Foundation /a and its subsequent span style="font-style: italic;" Poetry Magazine /span in the wake of having received upwards of $200 million from Ruth Lilly of Lilly Pharma drug fame back in 2002.
br / br / The magazine is one that I subscribe to. I have talked about it many times before in a href="http://fondakowski.wordpress.
com/2007/02/12/entertainment-weekly-reviewspoetry/" various blog entries /a , and have never changed my stance of complete and total love hate with that magazine. One thing I can truly say is this: it serves a purpose. You either love it or you hate it.
But you rarely feel indifferent to it. If this was Christian Wiman's goal when he inherited the magazine as editor in 2003 in the middle of this meshugas, then he has succeeded. br / br / So the woman at the counter says to me: br / br / "Have you read that simply awful article in span style="font-style: italic;" The New Yorker /span about the state of poetry today?
" br / br / "No, I haven't" I say, walking blindly into an ambush I sort of sense is there but go anyway. Maybe today I will be like Rambo: unstoppable, even when outnumbered and out elitisted. br / br / "It's just about how horrible span style="font-style: italic;" Poetry Magazine /span is.
Always publishing the safe poems." br / br / I nodded in agreement. I do agree with this.
They publish what I like to call perfect little poems - which do nothing to make me feel anything other than that the poems are perfect. They are not fresh with perspective or ideas or craft. They are just perfectly executed poems.
Then she continued. br / br / "I mean, really. They are just up there being a mess.
" br / br / "What do you mean?" br / br / "Well, that editor. I don't even know that editor's name," br / br / "Christian Wiman" br / br / "No, I don't think so.
" br / br / "Yes. Christian Wiman is the editor." br / br / "He's not the main guy though.
" br / br / "Yes. Christian Wiman is the editor of span style="font-style: italic;" Poetry /span ." br / br / "Well, anyway.
He and Dana Gioia are a mess." br / br / Now, when she said that, I got a little perturbed and realized she and I are polar opposites and I ought to escape while I still had the chance. I dislike span style="font-style: italic;" Poetry Magazine /span just as much as she does, but for completely opposite reasons.
I liken this agreement in opposition to the right wing militia and the left wing socialist: we all eat local organic, but they eat it because they refuse to support the government's industrial farming movement because they see it as a threat to the American Way; we eat organic and local because of animal welfare and the environment. Yet here we all are, eating within 100 miles of our own hometown. br / br / Now, how did I know this based on a conversation in which the woman who was speaking said upwards of nothing in about one minute flat?
Here's why: br / br / 1. span style="font-weight: bold;" Because she said nothing. /span You can't start arguing that there is something wrong with something unless you have something to base your argument on.
Now I don't even care if it is based on some poop you pulled out of your ass. It just better be something original from you. br / br / 2.
span style="font-weight: bold;" Because she based her argument on /span span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;" The New Yorker /span span style="font-weight: bold;" . /span You are going to call span style="font-style: italic;" Poetry Magazine /span a mess, based on something you read in the elitist span style="font-style: italic;" TNY /span ? br / br / 3.
span style="font-weight: bold;" Because she said Dana Gioia is a mess. /span Have you ever actually read any of a href="http://www.danagioia.
net/poems/index.html" Dana Gioia's poems /a ? Prior to seeing his name in this magazine, did you even know he existed?
Do you know how to spell span style="font-style: italic;" Gioia /span ? br / br / 4. span style="font-weight: bold;" Because she did not know the name of the editor of /span span style="font-style: italic;" span style="font-weight: bold;" Poetry Magazine.
/span /span And if you ever read span style="font-style: italic;" Poetry /span , then you would surely know his name since it is emblazoned on nearly every page of the blasted thing. br / br / 5. span style="font-weight: bold;" Because when I deduced she had never read /span span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;" Poetry Magazine /span , I saw her for what she really was: a sycophant of whatever or whoever is poetry's newest devil's advocate.
And a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Language_poets" a language poet /a .
(okay, okay: I know not all language poets are sycophants. But I have this suspicion that sycophants tend to be drawn more to language poetry schools rather than other schools. Why?
From upon the edge-pushing soapbox of LP, it is very easy to dismiss all other forms of poetry as boring, regular, usual, middle of the road, status quo, etc. In fact, that very well may be one of LP's main purposes). br / br / So, I had to do my research myself.
Now, I love a good poetry fight. So I read the article. It was generally boring as span style="font-style: italic;" New Yorker /span articles tend to be.
But at least now I know the lady in the store was not talking about Christian Wiman, editor of span style="font-style: italic;" Poetry Magazine /span . She was trying to talk about about the President of the Poetry Foundation, John Barr, who seems hell-bent on achieving mass-popularization of all things Poetry. In that vein I agree with sycophantpants: that's a big problem.
A Mattie J.T. Stepanek-sized problem.
br / br / It is dumb to pretend that "the people" (of said "mass" of mass-popularization) are a unified group with a single purpose. Hello. This is the ethnocentric United States.
Land of a thousand flavors, none of which consider the forty more thousand global flavors available to poetry. Poetry will never be unified "as it was in the good old days" because span style="font-style: italic;" the good old days /span were the days in which rich white folk made all the decisions on who was going to read what and the Internet did not yet exist to give us instant and searchable access to things like contemporary Iranian poetry. ( a href="http://www.
art-arena.com/forugh.htm" It's great stuff /a , by the way).
For the most part, The Man still does have the say: but not totally, and not for everything. Other voices than the span style="font-style: italic;" voices that be /span are surfacing. br / br / span style="font-style: italic;" With great power comes great responsibility.
/span br / br / What the hell does poetry need $200 million for anyway? Poetry is now and always shall be the cheapest art form. Pencil and paper is all that is necessary.
It is a mistake to turn poetry into yet another Capitalist venture. br / br / The world is filled with far too many kinds of people to assume that you could ever make a one-size fits all poetry. Some people hate Sexton.
Others love Collins. Some love Oliver, others hate Kooser. Not everyone loves Plath.
I for one think she should never have written a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://www.nytimes.com/books/98/03/01/home/plath-johnny.
html" Johnny Panic and the Bible of Dreams /a . Some hate Alexander, Scalapino, and Greenberg. Others love Gottlieb, Ratcliffe, and Hillman.
Everyone is correct. Who cares if you don't love 99% of its many iterations. You are not supposed to.
You are only supposed to appreciate poetry's reach, pick your niche, and move on. br / br / In this regard poetry has always been a dying art. Each tiny niche feels it's losing its foothold.
But poetry span style="font-style: italic;" lives /span to be a dying art. It lives to be misunderstood. It is not a capitalist venture (nor should it try to be).
It lives outside of that realm. And from that position and that position only is it able to change a reader, and transform a society one person at a time. You can say anything in a poem.
Anything. All that is required is risk and innovation, surprise, and craft - creativity, in effect. Sadly, creativity, in a capitalist or mass-marketed world of poetry, founders.
br / br / As soon as something becomes too popular, e.g. is a capitalist success (look at a href="http://www.
lost-tv.com/" LOST /a , look at a href="http://www.thecharmedones.
com/" Charmed /a , a href="http://www.nbc.com/Heroes/" Heroes /a , too, will have its day) it loses its popularity, because no art can sustain itself at that level for as long as a capitalist society demands.
We want our grande vanilla latte to taste just the same today as it will fourteen years from now. Well, if that's what you want, then quality will suffer. It must.
It does. Appealing to a mass society also means appealing to the lowest common denominator in order to keep the masses satisfied. br / br / Now, I could go on and on (like span style="font-style: italic;" The New Yorker /span article), but I won't.
Just hear this: that poetry is still a dying art is proof positive (and should encourage all poets out there) that poetry is alive and well. It has many faces. This fight over its waning state is what moves it from one century to the next.
br / br / Even "Harriet Monroe, who founded span style="font-style: italic;" class="italic" Poetry /span in Chicago in 1912, reflected in a memoir that at the turn of the century “the well of American poetry seemed to be thinning out and drying up, and the worst of it was that nobody seemed to care. It was this indifference that I started out to combat, this dry conservatism that I wished to refresh with living waters from a new spring" - e.g.
found span style="font-style: italic;" Poetry Magazine ( /span quoted from span style="font-style: italic;" TNY /span article span style="font-style: italic;" ). br / br / /span span style="font-style: italic;" /span Instead of focusing on the mass-consumption of poetry, I think what the good and right thing to do would be to share the wealth. There are far too many schools and styles and nooks and crannies in the great Poetry English Muffin of the world to assume one foundation, on its own, could ever possibly be a tour de force for all of poetry.
That's like saying the most important poetry in the world today is what's printed in span style="font-style: italic;" The New Yorker /span . Everyone knows no one reads span style="font-style: italic;" TNY! /span It just sits in a pile by your bedside making you feel guilty.
br / br / The Poetry Foundation should make a regranting program, a scholarship program, and a plan to run down the endowment so that it does nothing more than support its magazine and its Lilly fellowships. Give all the journals, all the schools, all the styles the chance to broaden their reach and publish more poets. Poetry is not going to be saved by whom you expect it to be saved.
Jesus was a lowly carpenter, remember. And hell, we're still waiting for a Second Coming. br / br / Two things I am going to have to flame the article for are: br / br / 1) Implying that Dana Gioia, because he was formerly employed by General Foods, is somehow the anti-poetry.
Wallace Stevens, whom the article glowed about four seconds earlier was a friggen insurance agent. Poets have to have jobs, so I don't think you can blame Dana Gioia for all that's wrong in poetry because he invented Jell-O jigglers. You should see the shit I have to do every day at my job to pay my bills and not live in poverty for my art and die crazy and drunk like Hart Crane.
It's disgustingly elitist (and ironic) for a span style="font-style: italic;" TNY /span writer to vilify a poet for the job they have. Gioia's success in bringing poetry writing workshops to soldiers is yet another niche being filled. As is performance poetry to kids in high school, and poetry workshops for incarcerated women.
We all need poetry. All kinds of poetry. br / br / This is the reason why, a href="http://fondakowski.
wordpress.com/2007/01/24/ten-down-none-to-go/" when I do not like poetry /a I don't say it's bad. I don't know if it's bad; I only know I don't like it.
There's a lot of people in the world, and whatever style it is, the poetry is going to find an audience, however small or big. This should be encouraged above all. br / br / 2) Billy Collins is anything but "unpreturbed" when he says "I suggested that the Poetry Foundation buy a ship, an Aristotle Onassis-type, hundred-and-ninety-foot luxury cruiser.
You’d call it the Poetry Boat, and take it around the coast of the world, then back it into the harbor in Saint-Tropez and I could give a reading on the stern." He's not making light of the situation. He's pointing out the glaringly obvious problem, the same thing Howard Junker means when he says "A gift this size to such a small organization is bad philanthropy.
. . .
The struggle for the staff and the board will now be how to spend the money. Sustaining the vision of a venerable little magazine will become an afterthought. Drowning in cash might seem a dream come true; more likely it will turn out to be a nightmare.
" Poetry + Money = Oxymoron. They simply span style="font-style: italic;" do not /span go together. br / br / Finally, to the opinionless sycophant who greeted me with inaccuracies and no true knowledge base in L's bookstore: even you are finding a purpose and passion through poetry.
So as I flame you out of one side of my mouth, I shower respect out of the other, but do encourage you to read more thoroughly before you start talking.
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br / br / span style="font-style: italic;" Things I thought while on the urban walk: /span br / br / 1. Did the dinosaurs enjoy those gorgeous toxic carbon sunsets up until their dying hot breaths? br / br / 2.
How do all those pastries in all those coffee shops ever get eaten? br / br / span style="font-style: italic;" Things I saw while on my walk: /span br / br / 1. 50-foot palms against a baby blue and pink dusk.
br / br / 2. A telephone pole completely covered with staples. I mean covered: it looked like the outside of the pole was actually made of thousands of staples.
br / br / 3. A field of flower fescue a block-long smack in the middle of downtown Berkeley. br / br / 4.
At least four different kinds of Magnolia, huge blooms I could smell at least a half block before I saw them. br / br / 5. Cake batter ice cream.
I actually also ate the ice cream; I didn't just see it. I just want to know how they make it taste like cake batter. No wait.
I don't want to know. br / br / span style="font-style:italic;" The Shuffle pod. /span What was most fun about it, was that in addition to music, I also have poetry on my iPod.
Every once-in-a-while I was blessed with a href="http://fondakowski.wordpress.com/2007/02/15/frank-o%e2%80%99hara-he%e2%80%99s-my-man-if-he-can%e2%80%99t-do-it%e2%80%a6/" O'Hara /a .
Mmm. br / br / I've Seen Everything, Trashcan Sinatras br / Bowtie, Outkast br / Dazzle, Siouxsie and the Banshees br / Dear Prudence, Siouxsie and the Banshees br / Poem [VFW], Frank O'Hara br / Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Wolf, Barbra Streisand br / Mad World, Tears for Fears br / The Day Lady Died, Frank O'Hara br / So Much, The Sundays br / Answers to Veoznesens and Evtushenko, Frank O'Hara br / Beautiful Disaster, Kelly Clarkson br / Love to Hate, Erasure br / Jam Knock, Brian McKnight br / Twilight World, Swing Out Sister br / In Between Days, The Cure br / Single File, Elliott Smith br / Homesick, The Cure br / Untitled, Concrete Blonde br / Girlfriend, Alicia Keys br / Come On-A My House, Bette Midler br / From the Ritz to the Rubble, Arctic Monkeys br / The Dumbing Down of Love, Frou Frou br / Introduction to Muriel Rukeyser, Charles Osgood br / So Cruel, U2 br / Nanci, Toad the Wet Sprocket br / Introduction to Langston Hughes, Charles Osgood br / Bust, Outkast br / He Touched Me (My Name Is Barbra two…too?) 1965, Barbra Streisand br / We Got the Beat, The Go-Gos br / Afternoon, Dorothy Parker br / Breezing Up, The Ocean Blue br / Touch, Sarah MacLachlan br / American Baby, Dave Matthews Band br / Alfie, Barbra Streisand br / Introduction to T.
S. Eliot, Charles Osgood br / Joan, Erasure br / Introduction to John Crowe Ransom, Charles Osgood br / Color My Life, M People br / Grass, Carl Sandburg br / Because, The Beatles br / The Way You Make Me Feel, Michael Jackson br / Tired of "Me", LIVE br / Prototype, Outkast br / 405, Death Cab for Cutie br / Good Day, Good Sir, Outkast br / Midnight, Red Hot Chili Peppers br / Introduction to HD, Charles Osgood br / Not Ideas About the Thing But the Thing Itself, Wallace Stevens br / Drive in Drive Out, Dave Matthews Tim Reynolds br / Don't Let the Sun Go Down on Me, George Michael and Elton John br / Into Dust, Mazzy Star
com,1999:blog-35562327.post-7700288401784673524
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) favorite movies. Now, I'm all for lists, but I am also all for lists that are constantly changing, as new movies are always coming out and my mood swings being just out of control, what with menopause coming down the pike in 10 or so years..
. br / br / So this list, though it is my favorite today, may very well not be my favorite tomorrow. Or even by bedtime.
And it is based not on films I respect in a general way (like all of hitchcock), but rather, on films I would watch over and over and over again, and still love them. br / br / Lastly, I'll say this, to disclaim the groans I'll surely hear at some of these films (if you can call them that) my absolute favorite genre is the human disaster movie. Sue me.
Remember, I'm the PWADJ who reads Charmed mass market paperbacks and in fact owns all seven seasons of that deliciously crappy show on DVD. br / br / I also don't know who directed them, but I'm not sure it will really matter for most of them. They are sort of in an order.
br / br / 1. The Matrix (just the first one - viewed at minimum 90 times, and counting) br / 2. The Hours br / 3.
Outrageous Fortune (yup, the Bette Midler cheesy 80s comedy) br / 4. Airplane (I am serious, and don't call me Shirley) br / 5. The Abyss br / 6.
Contact br / 7. Spider-Man br / 8. Princess Bride br / 9.
Wicker Man (the original not the remake, though it wasn't as bad as it could have been) br / 10. Ma Vie En Rose (I'm still crying) br / br / If this was a list of movies I adored but could never watch again then I'd add these: br / Brokeback Mountain br / Notes on a Scandal br / Short Cuts br / Far from Heaven br / Silence of the Lambs
com,1999:blog-35562327.post-6482001981195260900
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/a To skip the intro, scroll down to my prose poem "Peonies." /span br / br / Valentines’s Day is arguably poetry’s biggest day of the year. You could argue back and say that April First, and the proceeding month are (National Poetry Month), but NPM is really for the love of poets, and people who appreciate poetry – not the general public.
br / br / Valentine’s Day, on the other hand, is pretty much the unadulterated Mass Use of Poetry Day. You’ve got the span style="font-style: italic;" roses are red /span campaign, you’ve got Mattie J.T.
Stepanek, you’ve got Hallmark and Blue Mountain Arts, you’ve got Neruda quoted all over the town. Heck, you even have Goethe quoted on the cover of span style="font-style: italic;" Vanity Fair /span this month. br / br / a onblur="try {parent.
deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://bp1.blogger.com/_E4xqe3OTEXY/RdNUf4dhd7I/AAAAAAAAAAg/dYuD3RxqsFk/s1600-h/stuffedmug.
jpg" img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 190px; height: 190px;" src="http://bp1.blogger.com/_E4xqe3OTEXY/RdNUf4dhd7I/AAAAAAAAAAg/dYuD3RxqsFk/s320/stuffedmug.
jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5031458115411867570" border="0" / /a And people eat it up. Non-poets, that is. For what luckier girl is there who receives a hand-pressed letterpress card with a note inside from her significant other quoting Blake?
Swooning promptly ensues, and she quickly becomes the envy of all her non-poet friends who only received a cheesy stuffed animal in a love mug and a box of Whitman’s (no relation). br / br / Because I realized something: as a poet, you can’t really get away with simply quoting poetry anymore. It was cute when you were just starting out, were immersed in appreciating the work of Wordsworth and Whitman, were hopelessly romantic about your relationship with poetry.
But now, after the long years of toiling and crafting your work, your relationship has changed, and people want to see original works by you for them. Producing an obscure but beautiful quote instead of something new and special just for them at this stage in the game is kind of considered cheating. Maybe even lazy.
br / br / And that’s why this year, I opted for prose. As a poet, my prose is never quite as prosey as, say, David Sedaris. Okay, I am lying: I really wish my prose, and I aspire for my prose to be, an awful lot like DS.
Even so, I can write prose poems with the best of them. How convenient, then, that prose poems are this week’s a href="http://poetrythursday.
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