Yeah, fat chance of that. Wearing his green, gold and black trainers - the colours of Jamaica - Michael Holding is a proud West Indian right down to the soles of his shoes. And as such the subject of the plight of his beloved team is one he simply can't resist.
With just a few days until the showpiece moment in modern Caribbean cricketing history, when the West Indies open the World Cup against Pakistan at his home ground Sabina Park, Holding is back again as the 'Whispering Death'. This time though it is his sonorous voice and the twin themes of money and losing the people that do the damage.
"There is potential in this West Indies side but I see things I don't like," says Holding, one of Sky Sports' commentators at the World Cup.
"I see youngsters coming in and looking enthusiastic but after a couple of years in that squad they lose it. Perhaps there are a couple of bad influences who are not helping. These guys now get rich out of cricket and they are thinking at the end of a tour, 'Can I buy another house, another car or whatever'?
"It's all about money. That is all there is: money, money, money. You never hear a West Indies cricketer complaining about anything to do with cricket.
You don't hear the players' association saying we need better practice facilities or whatever. It is all about contracts, sponsorship and money. The focus is in the wrong direction.
"
"They must realise what they can do to lift the spirits of the West Indian people," said Holding, who won the World Cup in 1979. "This is the only thing we do as a Caribbean nation. Everything else is done as Jamaica or Barbados etc.
Even people from the small islands that have never produced an international cricketer stick to the West Indies team and follow it as if it is their own. All this team has to do is recognise that and do their best."
So, Brian Lara, the man of the 375, the 400 and the 501, the man one taxi driver in Kingston called "a Bob Marley, a living legend mahn", has lost the people.
"I read a report today that when they were passing through the airport they would not say good day to the people who went to meet them," says Holding. "They just walked through the airport. The captain had earplugs in listening to music and did not even acknowledge the people that went to cheer and greet them.
It is not an easy road to get that feeling back and we need the right people in charge of the team to do it. We need some strong people who are not afraid to step on toes."
It begs the question, will Lara's retirement - he is expected to exit one-day cricket at the end of the World Cup - free up some of the younger members of the side?
"It could but I prefer to wait and see," says Holding. "I would like to see what will happen when he leaves. Are people going to say, 'Well the star is gone we now have to be stars ourselves?
' If that person is a leader they will follow. If he is not setting the right example then it won't help." Without naming names, is Lara the problem?
"People can draw their own conclusions."
Holding is wearing a T-shirt that says "Jamaica means business". The success of the tournament is a close family concern.
With a house in Miami, Holding is a frequent visitor to the island and his wife is the venue manager at the new Trelawny stadium in Greenfields.
A purpose-built ground erected for this tournament, the future of Trelawny is uncertain post-World Cup. Sabina Park, that historic ground in downtown Kingston, is still the top international venue on the island and many in Jamaica believe Trelawny will become a white elephant, albeit one with a stunning view of the Caribbean sea.
"A lot of new infrastructures have been put in place but can we maintain them?" questions Holding. "This ground in Trelawny will have four warm-up matches and the opening ceremony.
What will they do with it afterwards?
"This World Cup is good for the Caribbean, yes, but we will make nothing out of it financially. The only thing we will have is a legacy and hopefully people will want to come back to the Caribbean.
A lot of people are hoping we fall flat on our faces. My wife has been telling me things have not been going as smoothly as they should but that is the West Indies. As the coin goes up in the air for the toss the last nail will be hammered in.
"
Holding breaks off for some banter with his brother. Ralph Holding is a well-known reggae musician in Jamaica and, at 58, five years Michael's senior. But Michael is boss, Ralph is 'Junior'.
He exudes respect, something he bestows on others only when they are most deserving. The International Cricket Council, and the minor teams at the World Cup, do not fall into that category.
"This group stage of 24 games is ridiculous.
We have 16 teams and half of them have no chance. They don't belong. It's all about money.
That's why the players are always thinking about money. It comes from the top."
Over to Ireland.
Beat the West Indies next week and you'll earn the respect of one old master but also confirm his worst fears.
Lets get back to the days when players [of all sports not just cricket] were very proud to play for their country and alot of them would have played for nothing. But on the other side, if a man has a special talent then he should be payed and payed very well to play for his country. The trouble is that some men are just driven by greed which happens in all walks of life, but to play for a team that is something special and each player needs to fit into that team not think i am better than him so i should be payed more than him.
That only breads discontent and we all know where that leads good teams maybe, but winners i don't think so. Posted by mick stafford on March 12, 2007 5:24 PM I think that "Mikey" has hit the nail on the head with his comments,"Money, Money, Money". Apply those same comments to the England team.
There is no pride in playing for England these days, remember Hutton,Boycott, Trueman, Statham, ( they bowled at the stumps, batman misses and he is out bowled) Now the ball is more likely to hit gully.
We taught the world how to play, now we are being shown how to play. But we are not learning.
Posted by Brian Kent on March 10, 2007 2:40 PM Mikey is right as uaual, but he is only echoing what dedicated cricket supporters have been saying for years: many of todays cricketers play solely for money and not the love of the great game or the honour of representing their club, state, county or country. Posted by Roger Davison on March 10, 2007 12:35 PM Holding is an arrogant ,self-opinionated wind bag. His childish rantings shows a lack of class and envy of Brian Lara.
Who cares about his views. They are so biased and rediculous that no one listens to him anymore. In my view he has no credibility and consequently should be taken off the air.
Posted by Tom Fields on March 10, 2007 3:56 AM Michael Holding is stating the main problem with todays cricket. It is simply too much money, and too much travelling about the world for really unimportant games.
Posted by Alan Rutherford on March 9, 2007 9:29 PM Holding tells it like it is.
That's the best way. Honesty. Posted by daz, aussie in London on March 9, 2007 8:59 PM Posted by Steve L on March 9, 2007 8:26 PM Posted by Jez B on March 9, 2007 12:28 PM Holding should be supporting the team and not be compaining at this moment when the biggest ever tournamnet of the Carribean is set to be flagged off.
This is not the right time to talk abt problems instead encourage the players to perform to their the potential.
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