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Covet this When a new nightclub opens, it's usually the sound system and fancy lights that owners can't stop boasting about. At Envy, Deepak Nath is gushing over the bathrooms and air conditioning.

Not the sexiest conversation starter, especially when you're talking about a downtown nightclub. But they have a special significance for Nath. They're what he calls his "sensitive points.

" His last club, Fahrenheit, was a popular spot during its five-year lifespan before closing in January. But the restrooms and air conditioning were always a black mark. "My bathrooms were the worst on 1st Avenue," Nath says.

"I would never have admitted it before, but I'll say it now." And man, could it get hot in there. Envy has some of the biggest air ducts I've ever seen.

"There's 70 tons of air going through there," Nath says proudly. "They're big enough to walk through." Of course, Envy is much more than toilets and vents.

Just ask the packed crowds at last weekend's opening, where clubbers seemed unfazed by the much-hyped snowstorm apocalypse descending on the Twin Cities. What they found is a bigger version of Fahrenheit's two-room layout, with different music in each room. It's located just a half-block from the old club, in the Wyman building along 1st Avenue.

Envy preserves some of the 111-year-old building's architecture, most notably the capitals of the tall pillars throughout the space. But the rest of the club is as modern as can be. Two long bars stretch the length of each room; the front bar changes into different neon colors, like something out of "Blade Runner.

" VIP bottle-service booths line the walls. A pretty immense-looking frosted-glass wall divides the rooms. If the main bars are crowded, check out the tiny bar hidden off to the side.

Nath describes the place as an "ultra lounge" of sorts, but expect a dance floor to spring up right in front of each bar on most nights. Which brings us to the music. There's a DJ in both rooms, with electronic music usually playing in the back room.

But it's Vegas-style mash-ups in the front room that are one of most exciting aspects of the club. You'll hear lyrics from today's hit songs over music from the '80s and '90s -- like Jay-Z over AC/DC or 50 Cent over Queen. Mixed together, it's stuff everyone can like.

A couple of other clubs have been playing this style already, and people really seem to dig it. On opening weekend, clubbers also seemed to be really digging the bathrooms, of course. They're down a full flight of blue-lit stairs on the lower level.

While Fahrenheit had three stalls total, Envy has six in the ladies' room alone. Which the ladies seemed very, very happy about. How could I tell?

All the sinks are basically in a common area where both sexes can watch each other tidy up (like at Chino Latino). While the music thumped upstairs, men and women down there were chilling around -- get ready -- the hand dryers. Sexy, I know.

Of course these weren't any old hand dryers. Nath got those hardcore Xlerator ones that shoot air out like jet engines. People actually want to hang out in here; it's a far cry from Fahrenheit's meager stalls.

It seems Nath's bathrooms shall shame him no more. Star Tribune. All rights reserved.

425 Portland Av. S.