The Sopranos

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Sounds intriguing, but where's Mr. Wu in all this?
Bada Bing!

A cleaned-up Tony Soprano and company hit A E Tony Soprano has been whacked.
Not by a fellow mobster, but by the A E network.
The cable network sliced and diced Tony and his crew to remove some of the award-winning HBO drama series’ violence, sexual imagery and salty language “to comply with A E’s broadcast standards,“ a network press release said.

A E bought the rights to show’s first non-HBO airings for a cool $195 million. Season 1 episodes of the mob family drama begin airing at 8 p.m.

Wednesday on A E. Two episodes of “The Sopranos” will be shown back-to-back each week.
The network says it has not cut the one-hour episodes to make them conform to the 42-minute running time typical of most hour-long dramas.

“The episodes will run largely at their original length and with some editing for content,” A E said.
Toning down “The Sopranos” wasn’t as difficult as fans might think: During filming, HBO stocked an archive of cleaned-up scenes (putting clothes on the topless dancers at the Bada Bing strip club, for example) and alternate tracks of dialogue. HBO used the same foresight in putting together a sanitized version of its popular “Sex and the City” series for syndication.

Tony is shown with a mob boss pal who’s in the hospital. To cheer him up, Tony has arranged for a stripper dressed as a nurse to drop by and take off her clothes. The nurse strips, but she’s shown only from the back.

At the Bada Bing, the “family” hangout, there’s a moment in which the topless exotic dancers on stage mourn dead mobster Jackie Aprile. Woke up this morning, found 'The Sopranos' on basic cable Eight years to the day after launching on HBO, “The Sopranos” will debut on A E Jan. 10.

It’s long been known that the cable network planned to begin airing the syndicated version of the hit mob drama in January, but A E has played coy about the show’s actual launch date. Now it emerges that its A E debut will be an anniversary party of sorts: “The Sopranos” debuted on HBO Jan. 10, 1999.

The acclaimed drama, about mob boss Tony Soprano and his fractions clan and mostly loyal crew, became the premium cable network's signature series and ends its run of new episodes next year.
If you’re wondering whether the show’s more racy and violent content will be trimmed for basic cable, it will be (but don’t expect the show to start resembling “Seventh Heaven” any time soon).
“Beginning with the first episode of Season 1, A E will present ‘The Sopranos’ with back-to-back episodes every Wednesday” at 8 p.

m. Central time, according to a Tuesday press release from the network. “The episodes will run in sequential order with appropriate editing for content, however they will not be edited for time.

The series was initially shot with alternative versions of many scenes and prerecorded alternative dialogue minimizing the need for editing.”
“The Sopranos” instantly becomes the most attractive offering on A E. The press release also lists the network's other marquee fare, which includes gems such as “Gene Simmons Family Jewels,” “King of Cars” and “Criss Angel Mindfreak.

” The prospect of me watching those shows? Fuggedaboudit.
Photo: James Gandolfini as Tony Soprano.

It’s hard to imagine HBO not doing things right, but that era may be upon us.
Back in 1998 and 1999, the pay-cable network debuted “Sex and the City” and “The Sopranos,” respectively, and used those upscale destination shows to build an impressive, 29-million strong subscription base and polish its image as the place for quality programming for grown-ups.
But now, as “The Sopranos” era comes to a close, the network looks vulnerable.

By killing off “Deadwood,” which debuts its third season June 11 and won’t return after that, HBO has publicly shot itself in the foot. For this buzz-dependent network, that’s a real rarity.
HBO has a little time to play with, but not much.

“The Sopranos” ends its run after a brief outing at the start of 2007, but frankly, based on what we’ve seen of the show’s sixth season, it looks as though it’s already run out of steam (more on that ) -- and the network has let it. The meandering, even dull nature of this season of “The Sopranos” is disappointing, but perhaps telling as well.
Does HBO’s signature show losing its way creatively signal bigger problems at the network?

Frankly, the creative decline of “The Sopranos” (not to mention the quality nose dive of “Six Feet Under” before it died) is downright alarming, viewed in the context of other recent moves by HBO.
“Big Love” is watchable and its cast is first-rate, but it’s not, in my opinion, a must-see program -- and how much more mileage can be wrung from the idea of polygamy’s intersection with “family values”? Perhaps I’ll be proven wrong and it is a concept with staying power.

Still, is a show about one man and his multiple wives the program that’s going to draw in the female viewers who were addicted to the ultimate thinking-woman’s romantic comedy, “Sex and the City”?
“Rome” is terrific, but it’s so expensive that one wonders how long the network will keep it going. “Entourage” has the buzz that HBO covets so much and it’s a delightfully diverting treat, but it’s no “Sopranos” and it will no doubt run its course in another two or three seasons.

Most shocking of all is the network’s decision to let the contracts of its “Deadwood” actors lapse, which effectively means that the show is not coming back after its third-season finale. Not coming back. Ever.

Let that stunning fact sink into your brain.
It’s like Admiral Nelson poking a hole in his own ship just before the battle of Trafalgar.
Sad to say, but I almost wish the series finale of “The Sopranos” was airing Sunday.

It’s not quite the end; after Sunday’s episode, another set of “Sopranos” outings will air in 2007. But if they’re anything like much of the past season, by the time the show actually does close up shop, the end will be long overdue.
shot Tony, the majority of episodes have been painfully slow and drawn out since then.

And this is not just the result of the show entering a contemplative, reflective phase, as the famiglia’s accrued sins begin to catch up with them. That would be an admirable tone to cultivate, and that melancholy flavor has seeped in effectively from time to time.
But too many Season 6 stories on this once-great show are stone-cold boring, insignificant or glaringly obvious.

Too many times this season, I’ve looked at my watch during an episode, wondering when it would be over. That shouldn’t happen.
“Luxury Lounge” was probably the show’s worst episode ever; did the writers really mean to satirize the fact that rich celebrities are gifted with endless amounts of swag during awards season?

Please. The entitled, gimme-gimme attitude from actors and the frantic marketing and product placement from consumer-products firms -- all of that parodies itself in the pages of any celebrity tabloid. Whatever its intent, the sour “Luxury Lounge” and several other episodes this season were, quite simply, stretched out and padded with filler, often to the point of absurdity.

For instance, during “The Ride,” in a conversation with Tony, Christopher obliquely referred to the time he came over to tell Tony that Adriana was talking to federal agents. Not only did we get that extraneous confession scene, but then we also saw several minutes of a present-day, distraught Christopher, high on heroin, stumbling about and nodding off.
Christopher is using drugs and the patina of responsibility to escape his grief over Adriana.

Got it. No need to hit us over the head with anvils for 10 minutes to make the point. Do the writers really think that we’re all that dim -- that every single thing on the show needs to be spelled out ad nauseam?

Or are they just looking to fill out the hour any way they can?
The trouble with this season is that though there have been various things at stake -- Vito’s life, for one thing -- so little of it has had any real impact. When Vito was murdered in “Cold Stones,” it was a horrific, terrible act, but at least in the resolution of that story, there was some dramatic tension at play.

But too often Season 6’s moribund pace and many pointless plots that went nowhere frustrated the creation of any dramatic payoff. Where’s the enthralling “Sopranos” of previous years, the show that had us on the edge of our seats over poor Adriana’s plight? Have we really been reduced to watching a show about credit card fraud and celebrity greed?

There have been some bright spots: Anything involving Carmela, including her gripping hospital scenes and her intermittently evocative trip to Paris, has been worth watching, thanks to the terrifyingly good Edie Falco.
As Johnny Sacramoni, Vince Curatola electrifies the screen in his all-too-rare appearances -- but also indirectly demonstrates that as Johnny Sack’s acting replacement, the increasingly prominent Phil Leotardo, actor Frank Vincent isn’t in the rest of the cast’s league.
If this is how things continue next year when the show finishes its run, it'll be a shame.

Tony Soprano deserves to go out with a bang, not a whimper.
So how did the sixth-season premiere of The Sopranos do? According to Nielsen Media Research, the March 12 broadcast of The Sopranos drew 9,465,000 viewers, 22 percent fewer than the premiere of the fifth season of The Sopranos March 7, 2004.

Then again, two years ago the HBO mob drama didn't have much competition on Sunday nights.
In any case, The Sopranos put a slight dent in its main competition, ABC's Desperate Housewives, which got a respectable 22.2 million viewers on Sunday, but to date this season, the show has averaged 25.

2 million viewers.
On the other networks, a movie on CBS drew 7.4 million viewers and NBC's Law Order: Criminal Intent drew 12.

2 million viewers. Fox was a distant fourth at 8 p.m.

, with Family Guy and Free Ride getting 8 million and 5.7 million viewers respectively.
For those obsessed with ratings and such (and I'm not, but I happened to have this information handy), here are the viewership numbers for every Sopranos season premiere, according to Nielsen:
This review of the new season of The Sopranos is by Tribune arts critic Sid Smith.

Less than a minute into the first installment of the new season of “The Sopranos” (8 p.m. Sunday on HBO), an FBI agent in an unmarked car suddenly gets sick and throws up on the side of the road.

Tony Soprano’s troublesome sister is seen nursing her baby, and why are we not surprised that the supremely selfish Janice is more irked at her the inconvenience than flush with motherly devotion?
In an obvious flashback, Carmela Soprano tells Adriana (whacked near the end of Season 5), “I’m worried all the time.” Adriana’s image then fades from the screen, like all those missing victims on “Without a Trace.

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Lost the plot of 'The Sopranos'? Check out our refresher course Credit once again goes to Sid Smith for this refresher on the previous seasons of 'The Sopranos.'
SEASON 1: Panic attack-prone Tony Soprano sees a shrink, the guys torch Artie's restaurant for the insurance, and Christopher and Brendan hijack trucks for extra cash.

Uncle Junior takes revenge on that and, for separate reasons, faces arrest. Tony gets Livia into a nursing home, where she plots with Junior to end her son's life. And we meet the nuclear Sopranos: combative bourgeois babe Carmela, princessy daughter Meadow and shy, uncertain Anthony Jr.

SEASON 2: Tony's hellish sister Janice shows up and becomes engaged to Richie Aprile. Big Pussy secretly talks to the feds. Furio, destined to be a Carmela flirtation, arrives from Italy.

Christopher is nearly killed, and Tony dumps his mistress, Irina. Janice murders Richie, and Tony and the guys off Big Pussy.
SEASON 3: The Feds plant a bug in the Sopranos' laundry room, Livia dies, Janice steals Svetlana's prosthetic leg and Meadow dates a multiracial college boy.

Tony's shrink, Dr. Melfi, is raped. Tony romances and dumps Mercedes saleswoman Gloria Trillo.

Christmas is a happy occasion, though Tony's idea of gift-giving includes beating up Janice's enemy and Meadow's new boyfriend.
SEASON 4: Christopher avenges his father's death, Uncle Junior prepares for a RICO trial, Tony and Ralph engage in a simmering feud and Tony gets word of ex-mistress Trillo's suicide. Tony weasels out of a housing purchase by torturing the dealer by blaring Dean Martin music, and Carmela blisteringly confronts Tony about his adultery.

Tony moves out.
SEASON 5: Tony Blundetto is released after 15 years in jail. He was arrested because Tony Soprano couldn't make the job thanks to an attack by thugs.

(In fact, secretly, a source of major guilt, Soprano had merely suffered a panic attack.) Carmela, hamstrung in her efforts to get legal help divorcing Tony, due to his clout, gives up and lets him return home. Adriana tries to enlist Christopher to join her in cooperating with the feds, only to be killed by Silvio.

And Tony B.'s antics get him on a hit list and exacerbate Soprano's struggles with rising kingpin Johnny Sack. Soprano himself executes Tony B.

and squares things with Sack just as an FBI sting operation descends on Sack's home. Tony Soprano narrowly escapes.
THIS SEASON: Will Johnny Sack turn rat and threaten Tony's freedom?

HOW Will Adriana's murder affect Christopher's attraction to drugs and ultimate loyalty to the mob? What's the real motive behind Carmela's letting Tony move back in? And Tony Jr.

? Event planning? What's up with that?

To get you into the mood for the Sunday return of The Sopranos, my colleague Sid Smith came up with this list of the HBO show's most memorable deaths.
On the late, lamented Six Feet Under, the dead departed dearly. On The Sopranos, they just get whacked.

Often without warning or, to be sure, moral hesitancy, they're frequently instant fodder for the fishes or the knives at Satriale's pork store.
But throughout the show's five seasons of cold-blooded carnage, there are still whoa -inducing moments, leading to our list of Top 10 'hits':

• Brendan Filone (Anthony DeSando). A young punk slain for his freelance crime spree with Christopher, shot at close range while soaking naked in the bathtub.

  Images of his demise are intercut with scenes of Meadow and her high school chorus singing All Through the Night.

• Matt Bevilaqua (Lillo Brancato Jr.).

  After his role in shooting Christopher, he's dragged to a remote shack, screaming Mommy, please, Mommy as Tony and Pussy fire away. In a creepy case of life imitating art, actor Brancato is currently charged in the actual killing of an off-duty cop.

• Richie Aprile (David Proval).

  A comment about Richie's son prompts him to sock his lover Janice (Tony's sister) in the mouth. As they prepare to eat dinner, Richie asks Janice if she's going to cry. Janice raises a gun and plugs him.

  Twice. Tony enlists Christopher and another henchman to butcher the body, and Livia, haranguing Tony, remarks, Babies are like animals. .

  .. Somebody has to teach 'em right from wrong.

  And if you ask me, I did a pretty good job.

• Big Pussy Bonspensiero (Vincent Pastore). His cooperation with the feds discovered, Tony's longtime confederate Pussy -- you were like a brother to me -- is taken on an almost gentlemanly ride on Tony's new yacht.

  Confessing to the strains of Frank Sinatra, Big Pussy is served a final round of tequila shots as well as rare hints of remorse from Tony, who nevertheless asks, Did you ever really exist?

. What went down while 'The Sopranos' were gone and what's ahead for HBO Six hundred and forty-four days.
The fifth-season finale of The Sopranos aired June 6, 2004, and the HBO drama finally returns March 12.

That's a gap of 644 days.
Nearly two years may not seem like a long time, but the truth is, the mobsters missed out on a TV revolution.