Today, the world lost another legend...
.the Godfather of Soul..
..James Brown.
There's never been another - before or since - who has influenced so many genres. I hope he's resting in a better place.
MIDLAND, Texas - A 3-month-old baby was left unattended in a shopping cart for about an hour Sunday when her parents accidentally left her behind, police said.
Shoppers noticed the abandoned baby at a Toys "R" Us store, Midland police Sgt. Alfredo Grimaldo said.
"It was a misunderstanding among family members," Grimaldo said in Monday editions of the Midland Reporter-Telegram.
"One man took the kids home and left the ladies to shop. But when he took the kids, he didn't take the baby from the cart."
The family members, who were traveling in different cars, didn't realize what happened until they all got home and nobody had the baby, he said.
"We don't think it was really a child abandonment issue. It was just a misunderstanding," Grimaldo said.
Police spokeswoman Tina Jauz said Child Protective Services is looking into the case.
I finally got around to the dreaded task of dragging out the Christmas stuff and decorating the house for the holidays. I dread it more and more each year and find myself doing less and less and wishing I didn't have to do it at all. I've managed to reduce the decorating to a very slim tree and the mantel.
Nothing outside. Nothing in the windows. I fear I'm turning into my mother, who now puts up only a tiny tree in the corner of the dining room, which comes out of a box with all the decorations on it and then goes back into the box the same way.
I guess it's the disruption in what I consider "normalcy". You know - having to move furniture around to put the tree up - which means extra furniture in other parts of the house..
.a twinkling, shiny thing in the living room that you can always see out of the corner of your eye while watching television - no matter how far you turn your head. And then there's the idea of a tree inside the house.
Trees belong outdoors...
not in the living room. I'm not a complete scrooge. I just don't enjoy the holidays the way other people do and I'm always happy to see New Year's Day coming around the bend.
It means things are headed back to "normal".
As a result of the wretched decorating extravaganza, it now looks as though Christmas threw up in my living room. I tried to distract myself from the task at hand as much as possible and from the thoughts that I was doing all this work - only to take it back down in a couple of weeks.
I put on AC/DC and turned it up loud...
but soon realized that I wasn't going to be able to tear my brain away from holiday stuff.
For instance, I have a number of obligatory gifts to purchase for bosses, colleagues, employees..
.I HATE obligatory gifts. I hate receiving them and I hate giving them.
Here's the snuff...
..I don't need any more junk!
! I don't want any more candles, nick-nacks, handmade personalized Christmas tree decorations or boxes of chocolate. What's worse, many of the obligatory gifts I have to purchase are for liberals.
Let's face it - they haven't exactly been in the "nice" list this year.
I set out to develop a list of possible gifts. There may be others out there who need help finding obligatory gifts for the libs in your life - so, after a great deal of deliberate thought, I've come up with the following gift ideas that should put a smile on the face of any moonbat you know.
# 1 Moonbat Holiday Gift:
Barbra Streisand's Newest CD - "Why I Hate The U.S.A.
"
This CD is chalk full of Barbra's greatest hits - including,
Global, Global, Global Warming
George Bush is a Racist
Katrina Was a Right Wing Conspiracy
My Friend Chavez
There's No Such Thing As Terrorists
All The Iraqis Need is Prozac
And many, many more...
#2 Moonbat Holiday Gift:
Mother Sheehan Rainbow Ringer Tee
A beautiful belly shirt featuring Cindy Sheehan pictured with her lover, Hillary Clinton, and the caption "Sleeping in a tent together until they all come home - or someone buys our books...
which ever comes first".
#3 Moonbat Holiday Gift:
John Kerry Rice Crispy Treats
Is there anything better than the thought of chowing down on John Kerry's face?
#4 Moonbat Holiday Gift:
Cynthia McKinney Barking Doll
Touch her anywhere and she'll bark like a dog.
May also be purchased with optional slapping, kicking and biting features.
#5 Moonbat Holiday Gift:
Toys for Illegals
That's right, folks..
.you can donate a toy for an illegal immigrant in the name of your favorite moonbat. Make sure that all those people who are already living off our tax dollars have a better Christmas than your own kids.
#6 Moonbat Holiday Gift:
Abortion Clinic Tour This is a great gift for those who have young daughters - preferably middle school age.
#7 Moonbat Holiday Gift:
Tickets to The View
What could be better than the solid advice they'll get from Rosie?
#8 Moonbat Holiday Gift:
A White Flag
Because everyone should fly the flag they pledge to from their front porch.
#9 Moonbat Holiday Gift:
Copy of The Iraq Study Group Report
They wrote it anyway.
#10 Moonbat Holiday Gift:
One Year Subscription to Jihad Today Magazine
Also available in Spanish for the illegals on your list.
#11 Moonbat Holiday Gift:
Michael Moore Commemorative Spoon
Extra large spoon - you, too, can be a big, fat, greasy pig.
#12 Moonbat Holiday Gift:
Gift Certificate for an HPV Vaccine
For an extra $500 you can couple this with a buy one/get one free abortion.
That's all I've got for now, but rest assured..
..PI Mom is on the lookout for more ideas to make your holiday easier.
In the spirit of holiday giving and an effort to reduce my own road rage, I've put together a few driving/automobile related rules that I'd like to pass along to anyone who happens to be driving in the South Central Pennsylvania region this year (actually, these rules apply all year long..
.so keep them handy). Honestly, folks.
..I'm walking on the edge right now with the idiotic drivers around here - so here you go.
..
1.
Put your make-up on at home. The ambulance/emergency personnel don't care if you've put your mascara on when they cut your ass out of your car.
2.
If you are afraid to drive on the bypass - take the back roads. DON'T drive 40 mph in a 65 mph zone during the morning rush hour. If you're not in a hurry - take the long way!
!
3. Merge, DAMN IT!
4. When finding yourself at a 4-way stop with me..
..it's important to remember that it's ALWAYS my turn.
5. With the exception of possibly two places in the city, where I am fully familiar with my surroundings..
.I'm NOT turning right on red. There is no traffic law that requires it and gesturing to me will not cause me to "remember" to turn.
Honking your horn will only insure that you will not only sit through the red light - but possibly the next green light also.
6. Speaking of horns.
...
please remember that they are designed as a "warning mechanism"...
meaning that they are to be used when someone is about to inadvertently back into you or for some other near-miss type of situation. Honking your horn at me for any reason other than those stated will result in my doing the opposite of what you are trying to get me to do. So, if you really want to get where you're going - stay off the horn!
7. For those of you who have no responsibilities and are able to spend your day Christmas shopping..
.please remember to get where you're going by noon and stay there until at least 1:00. The extra traffic on the roadways when I am making my lunchtime dash to Starbucks is only making your world a more dangerous place.
Don't you people have jobs???
???
?
8. I don't care if you talk on your telephone, but pay attention to what the heck you're doing.
If you were a good driver, your music would be up too loud to hear it ring.
9. I have really, really good insurance.
...
and I just got new brakes. Stay off my butt!!
!
10. If the light at Rohrerstown Marietta is backed up to the tracks- don't expect me to pull on to the tracks.
Yes, I am aware that the train comes through at 8am and we're sitting there at 7:45 - I don't care. You have two choices - back off and get through the next green light OR honk your horn and pull right up to my bumper and we're both sitting there until after the 8am train comes through.
Special note for Mr.
Silver Volvo Station Wagon who drives on College Avenue at 7:50 every morning and has passed a school bus on the right for the past two days...
I notice your license plate begins with FRK...
I have the last 4 numbers...
if you don't want to get your ass kicked by a girl in front of a bunch of school kids, do it again you irresponsible moron...
.then I'll see you again when I testify against you in traffic court.
These rules are subject to modification and additions at any time between now and Christmas - assuming I don't rocket some idiot off the front of my car before then.
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