A recent   showed that film stars wallow in self-love. Two Los Angeles psychologists (Mark Young and Drew Pinsky) measured traits like exhibitionism and vanity using a mathematical formula. Pinsky said: “Vanity is only part of it.

They crave attention, are over-confident of their abilities, lack empathy and can behave erratically. But they are often admired and well liked, especially on a first meeting, and perform well in public.”
Well, all this reminded me of politicians.

 Sure, politicians may not be narcisstic in the true sense (vain about personal appearance) but they are certainly narcisstic in other ways. They often suffer from some kind of megalomania, which is several steps beyond narcissm! I decided to surf the net and get some quotes from India as well as the West which would reveal politicians delusive thinking and their self-obsession.

What I got is by no means comprehensive. If anyone wants to add any interesting quote they are welcome.
I ll start with what I heard Mulayam Singh Yadav, the Chief Minister of Uttar Pradesh say after the Nithari serial killings - live on television (CNN-IBN ): Uttar Pradesh jungle hai to mai kya hoon?

 Chuckles.  Jungle ka Raja! Translated this means: If Uttar Pradesh is a jungle then who am I?

The king of the jungle!   
Lalu Prasad Yadav, the railway minister of India’s favourite quote, Jab tak rahega samosa me Aloo, tab tak rahega Bihar me Laloo”, meaning without Laloo, there is no Bihar just as without Aloo (potato) there is no Samosa. (A samosa is a stuffed puff which is deep-fried).

Everyone knows that Indira Gandhi, India s Prime Minister for 15 years was an arrogant woman. It was difficult to get quotes however. All I got was this quote from : 
All my games were political games; I was, like Joan of Arc, perpetually being burned at the stake.

Indira Gandhi.
The site had some quotes from an ex- PM of England. In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman.

Margaret Thatcher. Thatcher also said, I am extraordinarily patient, provided I get my own way in the end.
If you wish to be a success in the world, promise everything, deliver nothing.

Adolf Hitler has a fair share of quotes which display not just his arrogance but also his twisted thinking.  The victor will never be asked if he told the truth.  Hitler also said, Woman s world is her husband, her family, her children and her home.

We do not find it right when she presses into the world of men.
And a wringer from Sir Winston Churchill. History will be kind to me for I intend to write it.

Lenin and Nixon have some really abnoxious ones to their credit. A lie told often enough becomes the truth - Lenin. 
When the President does it, that means that it s not illegal.

This one is by Richard Nixon. Nixon also said, I would have made a good Pope.
Wondering why we haven t got to George Bush yet?

Well, here we are. Got some nice ones from : We dealt with the danger, and as a result the world is a better place and a more peaceful place, and the Iraqi people are free, and a free Iraq is in this nation s national interest - George W. Bush reacting to a growing chorus calling for an independent probe into incorrect pre-war claims about Iraqi weapons.

A  has a large number of quotes by Sonia Gandhi, the Italian Indian woman who is the President of the ruling Gongress Party in India. These quotes not only show her arrogant attitude but also her obsession with her family and with Italy. I picked few: Without the efforts of my madre-in-law, without my husband as the mainstay of his Indian subjects, without my son as the rising sun of our unhappy dark-brown people, continually starving since my family s rule began, Italy can never achieve full domination over my adopted madre-land.

The source of this quote is given as Signora Sonia s Evil Struggle Against Heathen Aggression. By Arun Shourie. Page 284.

Two quotes which show her obsession with her family: We must have faith in the son (i.e. Rahul Gandhi) and we must have faith in the daughter (i.

e. Priyanka Gandhi Vadhera). These are two cardinal principles.

If we doubt these principles, we shall accomplish nothing. The source of this is given as: Looks Do Matter. Selected Works, Vol.

IV, Page 422. 
Our point of departure is to serve my two children whole-heartedly and never for a moment distance ourselves from the hopeful future of my grand children; also to proceed in all cases from the interests of the above-mentioned people and definitely not from one s national interest; and to identify our responsibility to the people with our responsibility to the members of my family. The source for this is quoted as: Cast Away Fears, Prepare for Struggle.

Selected Works, Vol. IV, Page 28.
Then this clincher: All men must die, but death can vary in its significance.

The great Italian writer Mario Puzo said, When a giant tree falls, the earth below shakes . To kill thousands of innocent people in retribution for the killing of a single member of my family is a loyal, honorable and a pardonable thing to do. But a failure in condemning the massacre of thousands of others, sliced in vendetta for the burning of those who were not my family members, is wrong and anti-secular.

This is from an introduction to Management Guru C K Prahalad s book Market Mantras. Page 5. (To be published)
And this: We should eat pasta and cassata, guard against self-introspection and independent thought, and serve the Gandhi family heart and soul.

This comment is quoted from Arundhati Roy s Madagascar Peace Prize winning essay The Merchants of Death in the Money Hungry World of Globalization and Renewed Empire-Building which was published in the Outlook Magazine. June 16, 2003. Page 54.

I think this quote is the funniest and reveals her rather limited IQ.
Another  blog gave me a nice one on George W. Bush: Our enemies have made the mistake that America’s enemies always make.

They saw liberty and thought they saw weakness. And now, they see defeat.
Now let s see what the celebrities have to say.

Are they really worse than the politicians or are the politicians worse?
The man for me is the cherry on the pie. But I m the pie and my pie is good all by itself even if I don t have a cherry.

Halle Berry.
If it was something I really committed myself to I don t think there s anything that could stop me from becoming the President of the United States.  Will Smith.

He also said, In my mind I have always been an A list Hollywood star. Y all just don t know it yet.
 quotes Woody Allen saying, The first affirmation I need is really my own.

I don t look beyond that.
Our Indian stars can t be too far behind. Hollywood or Bollywood, they are all the same.

 quotes Shah Rukh Khan as saying, Awards that ignore me are losers.
 quotes the famous Rekha as saying, If I have a baby, I won t be able to focus on anything else. Then what happens to the babies all over the world with whom I m connected?

 quotes her as saying, Yeah, I m getting my price. Producers are even willing to pay me more than what I ask. But unfortunately, I can t do every film.

So I have to turn down offers. (Laughs) Chalo, at least this way others get work.
Pretty mild when one compares these celebrities to hardened politicians huh?

So now let s wait for a study which reveals the dangerous narcissim of politicians!
The researcher Pinksy also mentions that “We have also found striking differences between the celebrities and their jobs —the more real-life skills they have, such as musicians, the less narcissistic they are. So I guess that explains why politicians and film-stars are so alike!

Hindi films may have made $78 million in the United States in the last 6 months of 2006, but as everyone knows - it s the NRI s who are watching the films not the locals. The reasons why they reject Hindi films are the same as why we watch them. Well, I guess I can t speak for everybody but I can speak for myself.

I watch Hindi films because:
1. I like certain stars (won t name them here as they are too many of them!) and enjoy watching them on the screen.

If I hear that a movie is average but it has my favourite star, I ll go for it.
2. They are musicals and I enjoy the lyrics
3.

Hindi movies can make me cry 
4. They endorse family values (too conservative for westerners to digest)
5. They are about brown people
These are very reasons are why westerners cannot relate to Bollywood films.

But if some of us can relate to Hollywood films, why can t they relate to Bollywood?
Let s see why we like Hollywood films. Again, I will speak just for myself.

I like Hollywood films because:
1. They are technologically superior which makes for a slicker product
2. A large number of them have universal and more realistic  themes
3.

Acting even by B-grade actors is generally good 
So this means if Bollywood starts making movies which are technologically superior (which will need lots of money), cut out the song and dance, make movies with universal and realistic themes (Satya) instead of a family oriented tear-jerkers (KANK) then they will break into the Hollywood market?
But wait this doesn t mean the so-called crossover films like Black or even the English language Bride and Prejeduce . These films were far too Bollywood to be enjoyed by the western audience.

Hindi film directors efforts to cater to both markets haven t worked.
The only way that Bollywood films can gain a toehold in Hollywood is if they make a completely seperate product for that market by a director who understands the western mindset. But then such a film will bomb in India.

So what s the use anyway?
Know what? I love statistics but I wasn t impressed with the survey on whether Abhishek should marry Aishwarya (Mumbai Mirror).

But even as I was telling my daughter how useless such surveys were, I was reading it - like so many others. And I actually thought about it like so many others.
I wondered why a good 32.

5% of those surveyed thought that Abhishek was too good for Ash. Sure, I too prefer Abhishek to Ash, but hey, she is a good catch, isn t she? Beautiful, clever (she was a topper in school and the head girl as well) and an architect.

She also loves her parents (lives with them in fact), goes to temples and is from a decent, well-to-do family. If affairs are the problem well, he s had them too. Only less publicised.

Wait. I think I know why Abhishek is considered a better catch. He is rich, and in fact from India s first filmi family.

He was born with a silver spoon in his mouth. She is a middle class girl.
And then there s the male verses female thing.

Rich men and pretty women do go together but only if the girl is pure and untouched . Well, our sweet Ash isn t. She s a normal, full-blooded woman.

Thank God Abhishek is going for someone like that. He deserves her.
Listen to it here.

  The very song - Theme For A Dream - which inspired the music director of Munna Bhai Lage Raho.
Theme for a Dream was a popular song when I was in the teens. A song I used to hum to myself fairly often.

When I saw Munnabhai Lage Raho and heard a song in the movie which went Pal, Pal, Pal - I thought it was a haunting and familiar tune. I didn t realise it was this song which it reminded me of until someone who read my  pointed it out. He was kind enough to point me to this video.

I didn t even know there was a video of this song! It was a treat to hear it. And I hope others enjoy it as much as I did.

If film critics took into account the Entertainment Value (EV) of a film while reviewing it, then a lot of ‘good’ films could be dubbed as ‘bad’ and a lot of ‘bad’ films dubbed as ‘good’. At least that’s what the critics think. The reality is that a badly made film with low scores on editing, cinematography, acting and casting, direction, music, story-line and so on, is unlikely to have high EV and will never succeed at the box office.

In fact a film that makes money and has high EV is likely to score at least averagely on the above aspects, perhaps even all. It s subject is also likely to have mass appeal or high escapist value.
On the other hand, a film that flops usually has low EV and is very likely to be badly made or if it does happen to be well-made, it s flopped because the subject is (yawn) esoteric or because the treatment is stale or because the film scores very very poorly on at least one of the critical aspects …like say editing, acting or story-line.

Considering the primary objective of going to see a film is entertainment – I guess it s EV that finally counts. So let s just concentrate on that and leave the business of dissecting films to the cynics. Lets see a film from the point of view of the average cinema-going public.

People like you and me.
So how much EV do we give Don, which is a re-make of the 1978 Hindi blockbuster?
Ummm…I would say at least average.

On second thoughts, good! Shah Rukh plays the role of the dashing, flamboyant and philandering villain with panache. It s a relief to see that he does not over-act.

After Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna, I had almost forgotten that the man could act. But then he was always pretty good at playing the villain…remember Baazigar and Darr? Well, he sends a chill down our spine this time, with his menacing expressions and megalomania.

The movie, directed by Farhan Akhtar, begins with familiarising the viewer with the activities of this ‘Don’, a drug smuggler, but the plot really thickens when we find that our villain has a ‘double’. While the story-line is basically the same as the old one, there are surprises in store for those who expect a faithful re-make…
But what’s Don really about? Well…it s about a gang war between two ‘Dons’ – Shah Rukh and a faceless gangster called Wardhan.

It s about Don’s double Vijay who tries to save the day by helping the cops nab Don. It s also about Inspector D’Silva (played by Boman Irani) who recruits Vijay. Arjun Rampal plays the role of Jasjeet, an aggrieved father whose life has been ruined by Wardhan.

Later, as the end draws near, it s Jasjeet who plays the role of a catalyst in bringing the plot to a satisfying end. The end is in fact is one of the best ‘ends’ I have ever seen in an Hindi movie…the high rise chases, bloody fights, and a whammy of a twist in the tail. 
One mustn’t forget the pretty girls though none of them had a meaty role.

Kareena Kapoor does an item number to seduce Don, Isha Koppikar plays Anita the gangster’s moll, and Priyanka Chopra is Roma who joins Don’s gang to avenge her brother’s death. None these girls stand out, except perhaps Kareena. But she lacks the oomph that is so necessary to play the role of a seductress.

In this film Boman Irani (Inspector D’Silva) goes around with a bland expression on his face most of the time. And Arjun Rampal looks good but his acting isn t spectacular.
The music, by Shankar Ehsan Loy, is good and the song Aaj Ki Raat is special.

Main Hoon Don from the older version of Don, is a new and catchy re-mix, the background chorus of Don, Don, Don, adding a touch of the sinister. Yeh Mera Dil is also rehashed and made more contemporary. The song Khaike Paan Benaras Wala however falls short of Kishore Kumar’s original.

Overall the movie is fast-paced, picking up speed in the second half. There are a lot of thrills for the viewer…as long as he overlooks the glaring impossibilities…the way Don manages to escape sticky situations has a touch of the ridiculous …
Certain scenes like the one when Don falls off a plane or the car chase through narrow lanes seems familiar…probably ripped off from some English movie. Why does this have to happen…why do our directors not bother to choreograph their own scenes?

This kind of plagiarism of scenes has become so common now that no one raises eye-brows anymore…
All in all, Don is above average on EV. The racy plot, the double role, the pretty women, the song and dance and ofcourse - Shah Rukh’s acting. It s certainly not the Satya kind of gangster film, which had a high dose of reality.

It s best to watch Don with a complete suspension of disbelief. 
I was looking forward to nice time-pass when I went for Salaam Namaste. I thought Preity Zinta and Saif Ali Khan would be nice to watch.

However I didn’t get even that much. Sure, Preity looked cute and Saif has a good body and they both acted well. But if I have to say something else which is nice, I’ll have to scratch my head.

Songs were very average. However during the picturisation I didn’t scream with boredom.
The story?

Flawed from the beginning. Difficult to imagine that any radio jockey (Preity/Amber) would badmouth (on radio!) a person who comes late to her show to be interviewed to the extent they show.

Anyone who does that is not fit for the job. Or perhaps I’m taking the movie too seriously.    
Okay, so Amber meets Nick/Saif and they fall in love.

Next? Well, a few days later they move in together, ostensibly into separate bedrooms. I wonder if they are twelve year olds who think that two people who are madly attracted to each other can stay in the same house all by themselves in a romantic location, share bathrooms and manage not to sleep together?

This is India for gods sake. People have sex here too!
The director tries to show the couple adjusting to each other’s very different habits.

Strangely, Amber is fanatic about time but extremely messy as a person. I thought these two qualities didn’t go together. Then we have Saif who is never on time, a ‘creative’ chef but who is fanatic about neatness.

A guy who likes to sleep late and watch television late into the night but hey…he simply loves to wash the dinner dishes and make sure the kitchen is spotless before he does that. Wierd huh?
There’s more.

He’s a chef who loves to come home and cook! I didn t think chefs liked to come home and cook.
And this is just the first half of the movie.

The bad part actually starts in the second half. There is predictability and more predictability, crass comedy and a story which drags on. There are also some distasteful references to women and children…which the director thinks are funny.

Yawn. I simply cannot continue. I wish I had not wasted my time on this one.

If you seen and liked the old Munnabhai MBBS, then you’ll like Vidhu Vinod Chopra’s new version. I say version because it s not really a continuation of the first, not a sequel nor a prequel. Although the two main characters Munna (Sanjay Dutt) and Circuit (Arshad Warsi) remain the bhai’s they were, the rest of the characters are brand new.

Boman Irani, who is repeated in this movie, plays Lucky the Sardarji, an entirely different character. And there is no mention of Munna’s adventures in the first movie…
Bole to, Lage Rao is funny, simple to understand and meant for the masses and for people like me! The humour has nothing high brow about it, but I have to confess that it made me smile, grin, giggle and laugh out loud.

The humour is situational, in the dialogues, and ofcourse – in the dialogue delivery.
Like Munnabhai number 1, Munnabhai number 2 has an undertone of seriousness, a kind of preachy tone. It goes down one’s throat only because it comes wrapped up in comedy.

If the first movie was about love and compassion, this one is about non-violence. A comedy with lessons on non-violence? Gandhian principles?

Patriotism? Yeah. You might even find your skin prickle when you hear the Vande Mataram song.

And you might find yourself wondering why the ideals of Mahatma Gandhi have been forgotton in today’s modern times.
The story is slightly corny, but never mind. That’s exactly why it s funny, the comedy lying in the ridiculousness of the situations that Munna finds himself in.

Our Munna comes on the screen as an ardent lover of a girl called Jahnavi (Vidya Balan) a radio veejay (hints of Salaam Namaste). He has fallen in love with her voice and to impress her he has to pretend to be Murli the Professor. Therein start a series of hilarious adventures, one which reminds you faintly of a college scene in Munnabhai Number One.

There are dark undercurrents. Lucky the rich and bad builder (Boman Irani), has hired Munna and his goondas to get a house vacated…and as the fates would have it, this is the very house where Munna’s Jahnavi lives. And hear this - she lives in it with her old father who has turned it into a mini old age home!

Some heart-wrenching scenes here, but no time to cry as the movie tears on ahead at a decent clip, thanks to the decent editing.
Munna now has a very sticky situation on his hands, and there is also a lurking fear that Jahnavi will find out that he’s just a common goonda. Guess who comes to his aid?

Hold your breath - it s Gandhiji! Hints of the supernatural here.
The music – pal, pal, pal- is a haunting tune, and it sort of reminds me of an old English song I heard long ago.

Ofcourse I could be wrong, because I cannot remember which song exactly… the Hai re Hai Munnabhai song is not bad either.
All in all a well edited film, a very good first half, and good acting from all the four main characters – Sanjay Dutt, Arshad Warsi , Boman Irani and Vidya Balan. Vidya Balan doesn’t have much of a chance to demonstrate her talent, like she had in Parineeta.

It s Sanjay Dutt, Arshad Warsi and Boman Irani who dominate the movie. And it s Arshad Warsi who takes the cake! His expressions, antics and dialogue delivery are liable to give you a stitch in the stomach.

So if you want some time-pass, then Lage Rao is the movie to go to. At the worst, you might ridicule it or wonder at yourself for enjoying it, but one thing you won’t do, and that’s go home with a head-ache.